It seems all of us wants to settled down in life– at least most of us or - many of us– RIGHT?
This mindset is the root-cause most of our woes, miseries, anguishes, distresses, despairs etc. etc. in our lives – and creates many negativities.
Because it works on the exact opposite principal of the Laws of nature.
The Nature is about continuous evolution – the fundamental of which is constant-change.
Although many of the unsettling experiences/incidences are pleasant - being comfortable-with and excited-about with the life's unsettling hands – is the key to happier and less stressful life.
In this VUCA environment and disruptive-world – now being unsettled is the Settled.
Most of our popular folklores and the movies along with the fictional love-stories have sold us this crazy notion of living happily ever after.
All of us have bought this illusion hook, line and sinker.
We are conditioned to expect and keep looking for it throughout our life – and like mirage it normally doesn't happen.
If you can examine this objectively - This happily-ever-after-life is as true – as all the women and the men having exactly same nature, thought-process, expectations, needs etc. etc.
Let us do a small test – Ask yourself which of the followings actually makes you fully at peace [please add whatever I might have missed]
- 1.Coming into puberty
- 2.Being a teen - an adolescent [ this goes for both the teenagers as well as their parents]
- 3.Shifting to a new town
- 4.Taking a new job/Losing your job
- 5.Finding your heartthrob – yes it can change your life unlike anything big-time
- 6.Getting married
- 7.Having kids for the first time or any number of times
- 8.When kids are getting married
- 9.When kids have their own children
- 10.Financial losses
- 11.Onset of old age symptoms
- 12.Loss of loved ones, Breakups with friend spouse, partner etc.
- 13.Getting promotion/a big raise
- 14.Getting a fortune being gifted o you/winning a lottery [yes-yes I know this is a very rare event and happens only to rarer people – it definitely won't happen to you]
- 15.Becoming famous
Even though some of them are really very-very happy events – it would still take us through roller-coaster of emotional bell-curve.
Settling-down, living-happily-ever-after is a mental and emotional-fantasy.
When we are disillusioned with the expectation of this (UN)Reality - instead of welcoming change* we resist it, we fight it, we delay it till it can longer be postponed.
9 benefits of being unsettled
[throughout this article as in all my blogs in Success Unlimited Mantra – all the *marked ones mean there is a separate and detailed Do-it-Yourself blog on that topic]
- 1.If you are expecting a big trouble – and are prepared for the worst AND what happens is lessor – your stress*-levels would be withing positive*-levels
- 2.Because you pro-actively seek change* - change will never make you upset
- 3.As you always try to find better ways of handling newer and bigger-problems* – you may discover some-cutting edge solutions* those can even make business*-sense
- 4.You will constantly evolve to be a more capable and competent person
- 5.You will be able to spot the trends* sooner than others – and – if you can develop entrepreneurial*-mindset* - you would be able to create disruptions*
- 6.You will become a Game-changer*
- 7.You can live an extra-ordinary* life
- 8.You ae not scared to take Risk*
- 9.You are Yourself* or you can be You best self
38 ways on How to create the mindset of making most out of being Unsettled
- 1.Expect the unexpected*
- 2.Stop-expecting The Expected
- 3.Learn how to be prepared for the Unexpected – by exploring all that can go wrong – and creating solutions/strategies to handle them
- 4.Learn to learn the rules first and then break all the conventional-rules and thinking to discover newer-better-more effective ways
- 5.Turn your life upside-down*
- 6.Develop better habits of mind*
- 7.Create a regimen of Disciplined* life
- 8.Experiment with new*
- 9.Explore the uncertain – by taking small size risks*
- 10.Treat every upset* as the opportunity* to change
- 11.Become a master in exploring options, possibilities and solutions – those which are simple
- 12.Simplify* your life
- 13.Stick to the basics* - the fundamentals which leads to sustainable* solutions*
- 14.Identify how you want your life to be – then discover your most inspiring Why's to live like this
- 15.Prioritize* and choose only the most important ones
- 16.Never settle for mediocrity – aim for excellence*
- 17.Ditch perfection* over the larger outcome of accomplishing your goals*
- 18.Focus on creating a masterpiece* of your life
- 19.Build, Develop and Boost your resilience*
- 20. Let go of fear* of failures*
- 21.Learning to Let Go*
- 22. Learn to relax*
- 23. Learn to be comfortable with Discomfort*
- 24. Live an interesting life – consciously break your Routines
- 25. STABILITY OR UNPREDICTABILITY - CHOOSE BOTH and balance between the two
- 26. Discover the joy of becoming unsettled
- 27.Get connect with your own heart and Soul
- 28. Start living your life based on your passions and as per other people's wishes
- 29. Choose people who are energetic, enthusiastic and have zeal to change
- 30. Don't try to control everything – especially the results – focus on your efforts, goals and improvising*
- 31.Be comfortable with the idea – that you would be wrong many times
- 32. Take ownership* -stop blaming*
- 33. Negotiate instead of complaining*
- 34. Learn to listen to criticism* - objectively detaching yourself
- 35. Stop impressing others – stat expressing yourself*
- 36. Discovering the Roots of Your Restlessness - find fulfillment from the inside out
- 37.Write down your concerns and anxieties* – find ways to address them
- 38. Don't overwhelm yourself with too much - Take one step at a time