Dealing with Your Emotional Insecurities

Are You Emotionally Secure Find if You are Emotionally Secure or Insecue

Dealing with Your Emotional Insecurities

In this article you will learn

  • -27 Signs of How to spot an insecure person [Outwardly Observable Signs] - You can also identify – whether you have insecurities – the more yeses – the bigger insecurities and hence the greater need for treatment/therapy]
  • -34 Signs to find How Insecure You are – please understand – that all these must be your driving motivation and main focus to do – everything that you do, then only it connects with your emotional-insecurities
  • -18 ways our emotional-insecurity affect and impact our Life - The BIG Insecurity booby-traps
  • -25 Internal-dialogues and self-talk of emotionally insecure people
  • -43 Tips on How to deal with your insecurities – because emotional insecurities is a very-very long haul and slow-road to recovery – all the following tips given below have their own respective actions and my separate blogs and YouTube videos for each of them

Most of us go through small-temporary phases of insecurities, uncertainties, anxieties – numerous times throughout our lives.

We are forced in to situations that we must deal-with - even though we don't have any clue on how to handle it.

Yet the moment we get into action mode by trying, experimenting and taking-baby-steps – many of these insecurities and anxieties vanishes on their own.

On the other hand - Most of the problems that we have in our personalities, our relationships, our growth, our success, our happiness, our confidence levels, our self-esteem, our self-worth, our dependency on/substance-abuse etc. etc. – has its roots in our sub-conscious insecurities.

How we develop emotional insecurities is very complex and can't be fully identified in each case – it has contribution from various factors – from genetics to our conditioning to our upbringing-environment [most are beyond our area of control and influence – as at the time of happening we did not have the competencies to handle them better].

But once we become aware about our emotional-insecurities - if we don't take actions to make us feel secured through inner-reengineering - it is plain suicidal.

When our insecurities start creating mayhem in ours [as well as lives of those who are connected with us closely] - And we don't deal with it on war-footing basis – our life become hell.

AND we also create pains, hurts and problems for our closest, our nearest, our dearest and our most loved ones.

The more deep rooted insecurities you have– the more suffering for the people who are closest to you.

Insecure people use higher Level of Aggression – the submissive-insecure people use – the most dangerous form of aggression that is passive-aggression.

All the dictators and many well-known powerful people are/were emotionally-insecure [whether of countries or in families or in organizations or in religious and as in terrorists].

It is said that Hitler was so emotionally-insecure [of exposing his weaknesses] – that he didn't get married till the last moment and after that he co-committed suicide.

In current world of Politics in many countries including yours – you can identify few of the most criminally-insane-insecure people – who are in positions of POWER and are wrecking lives of people, economy and societal structure [and they are doing it extremely well].

You would definitely have come-across and have faced highly insecure people in your close relationships, in your job as well as in your societies/ communities.

In many cases professional help is needed [when we are unable to deal with these on our own].

27 Signs of How to spot an insecure person [Outwardly Observable Signs] - You can also identify – whether you have insecurities – the more yeses – the bigger insecurities and hence the greater need for treatment/therapy]

[If you are honest with yourself and find yourself agreeing with more than 6 of these signs – which drives your day-to-day actions - Then you must deal with your insecurities immediately. You can seek Success Unlimited Mantra's help].

  • 1.Controlling and domineering attitude
  • 2.Urge to suppress others through Aggression and power that you have
  • 3.Use of positional power to subdue people
  • 4.Showing-off to impress others
  • 5.Emotional blackmail – using other's weaknesses that they have shared in good faith
  • 6.Being jealous and envious of others – just because others have something that you don't
  • 7.Bulldozing to have My-way or no-way
  • 8.Bullying others
  • 9.Threatening others
  • 10.Obsessed with taking and posting selfies and videos every-day on social media
  • 11.Regular Infidelity while being in a committed relationship
  • 12.Throwing tantrums to get what you want
  • 13.Boosting about self even when it is not needed
  • 14.Name dropping to impress others with how well you are connected
  • 15.Talking big about self – magnifying an insignificant accomplishments as something great
  • 16.Creating impression how busy you are or how important you are - People who want to seem important want to create the impression of how busy they are and how much they have to do – therefore if they give a time to meet you - They'll never be the first one to arrive there [By forcing you to wait give them a sense of power]
  • 17.Always be in rush – to portray how busy they are - People trying to seem important will act as if their schedule is so full that they can't really spend any time with you
  • 18.Surrounding yourself with yes-sir/yes-ma'am people
  • 19.Very Arrogant
  • 20.Know it all
  • 21.Poor listeners and Continuous-talkers
  • 22.Sometimes using "out-of-office" auto response on email - even if they're not away
  • 23.Exaggerating accomplishments on social media
  • 24.Behaving as if they're the smartest person in the room
  • 25.Blaming others – whenever anything goes wrong
  • 26.Fault finding in others – mainly to hide their own weaknesses and also to divert and distract from their lacunas
  • 27.Taking credit for other's efforts and results

34 Signs to find How Insecure You are – please understand – that all these must be your driving motivation and main focus to do – everything that you do, then only it connects with your emotional-insecurities

  • 1.Always trying to seek other's approval and validation
  • 2.Have very strong urge to be accepted by the groups and people – whom you look up to
  • 3.Always trying to please others – at the cost of your rights, needs, wants etc. etc.
  • 4.Always trying to impress others - You have a compulsive need to impress others
  • 5.While alone and thinking - Your thoughts are mostly about others
  • 6.You let people take advantage of you – even though you know they are using you
  • 7.You don't protest or put your foot down – when people take away your rights
  • 8.You have a constant fear that your partner may leave you
  • 9.You say sorry more often – even when it is not your fault
  • 10.You can't say NO – to the demands of others - because you feel it might hurt them or displease them
  • 11.You say yes to others more often than you like – especially to those which you know are downright wrong
  • 12.You sulk – when others have done something bad to you and you could not even confront them
  • 13.Backbiting behind others and be part of the gossip groups
  • 14.When people don't thank you or acknowledge what you have done for them – you burn with rage
  • 15.You wait for the right moment to take revenge and create plans to settle scores or teach lessons – when someone did not do what you wanted or said no to you for something
  • 16.Feeling hurt – when you have done something for others and – they didn't even bother to acknowledge.
  • 17.Cursing and wishing them hell
  • 18.Being too consumed with what someone said [your impression and perception] – by reflecting on it for days
  • 19.Going out of your way to accommodate the feelings and needs of others
  • 20.Always seeking attention of others
  • 21.Willing to do anything to be in lime-light
  • 22.Becoming overly anxious when you perceive – others are judging you
  • 23.Unable to take compliments from others gracefully – instead proceeding to point out all the things that are actually wrong with you
  • 24.Putting yourself down around other people in a way that actually highlights your insecurities
  • 25.Lying about who you are and what you think, feel, or believe around others - by pretending or creating a mask of who you are
  • 26.Staying in toxic relationships - in spite of knowing that it is harming you
  • 27.Constantly comparing your life and yourself with others and other's life – [AND off-course you will find - that while others are living and having great times, yours is the worst possible]
  • 28.You have a constant need to be reassured by others – about – your being worthy
  • 29.You depend on others for your being happy and satisfied
  • 30.You Read Too Much into - What other people said or did – without even checking/verifying if your assumptions and perceptions are true
  • 31.You are Obsessed with your Personal Appearance – as per the media's ideal man or woman
  • 32.You have become a loner - you have very less social life besides your partner
  • 33.More often than not – you find yourself defending your views, justifying your actions, explaining your reasons – just to feel better with yourself
  • 34.Taking out your frustration and anger on weaker person

18 ways our emotional-insecurity affect and impact our Life - The BIG Insecurity booby-traps

  • 1.You will always attract the wrong types of people in your life – who are either there to get whatever they can from you OR who are as screwed-up like yourself
  • 2.You are unable to have respect for yourself and may feel worthless
  • 3.You will depend on external superficial aids, quick-fixes and unhealthy methods - to make yourself feel temporarily better
  • 4.Your self-worth is attached with other people's appreciation and recognition of yours
  • 5.You will find your rights being neglected
  • 6.People will use you BUT when you need them – they will just create excuse to avoid helping you
  • 7.You won't be able to retain good relationships, in case you are able to find someone worthy – you will either say something or do something to scare them away
  • 8.You will often get ill-treated by others
  • 9.If your insecurities do not kill the relationship – then it would certainly cause lots of hurts, disappointments, conflicts, misunderstanding, pent-up feelings etc. etc. in others as well as yourself
  • 10.You will be living your life being someone else - as you thing you are not good enough so you need to become someone else
  • 11.Because you lack trust in yourself – you will have trust issues in your important relationships
  • 12.You will project your insecurities – on your close relationships – as their being bad
  • 13.You will constantly in state of panic of say losing job or a relationship etc.
  • 14.You will cry very easily – for no reasons
  • 15.You will also laugh too much at smallest reason – to mask your unhappiness and void
  • 16.When we laugh as well as cry for small reasons – it only indicates that you have unhealed wounds, hurts and sadness welled up within you – which actually needs healing immediately
  • 17.You will always be suspicious of others and feel that your partner/colleague are doing something behind your back and not telling you
  • 18.You will always be in internally agitated and sad and hurt state – although some people manage to show a very perfectly blissful picture for the world

25 Internal-dialogues and self-talk of emotionally insecure people

  • 1.I am stupid
  • 2.I am not smart enough
  • 3.I will never be as good as them
  • 4.How great life they are having
  • 5.I am unattractive - I am fat, thin, dark
  • 6.I am inferior to other people or other are superior than me
  • 7.I am a failure - I am such a loser
  • 8.I never get anything right
  • 9.No one really loves me
  • 10.How can I be expected to do all these things
  • 11.Only I am the one who has to go through all these
  • 12.Why others put me under so much pressure
  • 13.Who cares – I can get away with this - let me put this off until tomorrow
  • 14.No one appreciates me
  • 15.No one believes in my abilities
  • 16.No one likes me
  • 17.No one understands my pain – although you have never shared it with them yet you expect them to read your mind
  • 18.She/he is too good for me
  • 19.I will give him/her all that he/she wants to prevent him/her leaving me
  • 20.As soon as she/he gets to know me - she/he will reject me
  • 21.If I am not in command and full control – they will control me
  • 22.It's my fault that she/he left me
  • 23.I should not allow others to see my weaknesses and vulnerabilities
  • 24.I should not have said that/done that
  • 25.If only I had done that or not done that

43 Tips on How to deal with your insecurities – because emotional insecurities is a very-very long haul and slow-road to recovery – all the following tips given below have their own respective list of multiple-actions and on each there is my separate blog and YouTube video for each of them

  • 1.Getting in touch with yourself – finding the real you with all your fears*, anxieties*, negativities, failures*, regrets*, mistakes* AS WELL AS all your strengths*, victories, triumphs*, positivity's* etc. etc.
  • 2.Practicing to accept yourself
  • 3.Loving yourself unconditionally
  • 4.Learning how to be vulnerable to share with people who are your most trusting ones – then to gain confidence to be able to share these in forums
  • 5.Practicing Assertiveness in claiming your rights and saying no
  • 6.Understanding the triggers of your anxieties and Learning to deal with your anxieties* effectively
  • 7.Identifying which of your fears are holding you back and down then Learning to deal with your fears*
  • 8.Learning to deal with difficult people, manipulative people, arrogant people
  • 9.Learning to deal with Toxic People and getting them out of your life
  • 10.Identifying your weaknesses and Learning to turn your weaknesses into strengths*
  • 11.Building your confidence – by focusing on your Dreams – and taking actions towards them
  • 12.Committing on creating excellence
  • 13.Giving your 100% - in all the meaningful pursuits
  • 14.Use the energy of your frustrations*, irritation, anger* to build something of value
  • 15.Express yourself using I statements – by being fully honest with yourself
  • 16.Enrolling a mentor - who can help you in sharing your insecurities – with him/her
  • 17.Creating trust in yourself and your abilities
  • 18.Joining groups and creating communities for support - of people who are facing or have faced similar situations
  • 19.Identifying the areas your stress comes from and learning to deal with your stress* effectively
  • 20.Stopping to never compare yourself* with others
  • 21.Identifying the type of life you want to live and then taking steps to create and live this life
  • 22.Boosting your social*, emotional* and other 42 types of intelligence
  • 23.Creating a life that makes you feel great and worthy and value-based
  • 24.Learning how to deal with put-downs, insults and unfair treatments
  • 25.Focusing on self-care – through exercising, meditation, eating-healthy, rest and relaxation techniques
  • 26.Involving yourself in hobbies that makes you challenge yourself by stretching you beyond your current capabilities
  • 27.Regularly up-skilling* yourself with the current and future skills -so that you are always employable
  • 28.Creating financial security by generating income through multiple means*
  • 29.Not bothering about what you can't do – which is beyond your area of influence currently
  • 30.Taking actions within your area of control
  • 31.Challenging yourself and experts through asking tough questions
  • 32.Questioning and testing your assumptions and perceptions*
  • 33.Reframing* your beliefs in such way – so as to make you feel better about yourself
  • 34.Learning to be yourself all the time in every situation and with every person
  • 35.Finding courage to leave any relationship that pulls you down
  • 36.Identifying and Knowing your worth
  • 37.Detaching your self-pride, self-value, self-worth – from other's opinions
  • 38.Focusing on meaningful ends and results – like happiness, great relationships with your closest people
  • 39.Taking calculated risk* – to boost your situation handling capabilities
  • 40.Learning to solve problems creatively
  • 41.Accepting challenges – to boost your own belief in self
  • 42.Setting clear healthy boundaries with other people - Identifying what you will accept from others and what you won't and to stick with it
  • 43.Creating discipline and practicing to create healthy habits of mind*

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