When to give up

​When to give up, When to give up and when to rough it out, Reasons not to give up on life

There are times, occasions and circumstances when you MUST #GIVE-UP.

Then there are times, irrespective of the compelling situation you JUST #DON'T-GIVE-UP.

Then there are situations, when things feel too overwhelming, that you feel that, there is no hope whatsoever and you need to end the suffering by choosing to quit on life, YOU MUST #SEEK-HELP.

In many situations, giving up could be the best that you can do to yourself and maybe others around you.

Yet in many of the contexts, it is necessary to #rough-it-out by going through the most #overpowering-odds.

Our Facing the #difficult situations, in spite of all the #threats, #fears, #anxieties, #uncertainties, #risks – is the only sure shot recipe of long-term #happiness, #success, #growth, #development, #relationships, #satisfaction and #memorable and #meaningful-life.

Our society teaches us never to give up, it is just not true. Sometimes the #resulting #stress, #pain and other accompanying #experiences are not #worth going through them.

Many times, giving up could actually be the signs of your #courage, #power and #control.

Typical reasons which makes people want to give on themselves, others and maybe even their life

1.Financial Crises
2.Series of Career and professional failures
3.Relationship issues, like break-ups, divorce, incompatible relationships*, cheating by spouse/partner etc. You can read about how to handle these in another website http://relationshipandhappiness.com/
4.Death of loved ones
5.Long ongoing illness
6.Being alone or loneliness - those who haven't been in a relationship for a long period of time those who struggle to find the right partner*
7.#Psychological issues*, many times some people have everything in Life and still feel like giving-up
8.A series of failures and #setbacks
9.Finding themselves #mis-fit, they can't adjust to themselves being #unique*
10.Being bullied by others constantly
11.Being ridiculed, insulted and put-down by others
12.Being #exploited by others, taken #advantage of by others
13.Unable to stand up for themselves
14.Unable to #fight-back or resist in face of difficult situation and people*
15.They are not disciplined enough to work hard to get worthwhile accomplishments, as they have been getting everything very easily
16.They only notice mistakes and failures, not the lessons of growth that these have brought
17.They are focused on fast results
18.They care more about the end results, rather than the entire process that is needed to reach that goal-post
19.They can't handle change and don't want to learn, what can give take them to their dreams

All the # & * marked ones are the ones on which you can read #DIY tips in my different blogs in https://successunlimited-mantra.com/ as well as in http://relationshipandhappiness.com/

WHEN IT IS ALRIGHT TO GIVE UP

1.When quitting something, gives you a chance to do more meaningful things & those which can make You a better yourself
2.Trying to #Change others
3.Trying to #Control others
4.Having #Expecting from others
5.Doing nothing yet expecting wonderful results
6.#Quitting without #trying
7.Letting your fear take control of you to stop you from #doing what you can
8.When your #actions may cause hurt, loss or pain to others
9.Doing the same things, the same way again and again and expecting different #results
10.#Suppressing your feelings OR not expressing your opinions
11.Trying to please everyone
12.Living life as per other's #wishes
13.Letting your fear of what others would think #guide your life
14.Feeling bad about your past #mistakes and #failures
15.#Living your life in #past
16.Feeling bad or reluctant to seek help from others
17.Not being assertive to claim your #rights
18.Blaming others for their situations
19.Feeling like victims always
20. Not living life of your dreams and passions
21.Having people in your company, who are toxic. Meaning, they constantly pull you down, insult you, berate you, drain your energies, make you feel bad about yourself
22. When pursuing some objectives or goal, is making you really, really unhappy
23. When the only reason you haven't quit already is because you're worried about what other people will think
24. You're the only person who shows interest and is working, in solving the problem or reaching the goal, but the outcome also depends on other people, especially in relationships
25. Doing something makes you feel poorly about yourself or makes you hate yourself

Now let us see, when we need to JUST PUSH OURSELVES

In the following situations giving up is simply stupid, THESE ARE THE REASON YOU NEED TO PERSISTS WITH YOUR EFFORTS, COME WHAT MAY

1.When you would feel, completely let down or ashamed of yourself, if you give up

2.When, it will impact the lives of many, if you give up. And would actually contribute to other's life if you continue

3.When others would quit too, as you are their role model[surprisingly I am yet to come across someone, who is not considered a role model by at least one person]

4.When you quitting would prevent something good from happening

5.When your quitting would make something bad happening to you, your family to the world

6.When other people, places, and things desperately need your efforts

7.When you can not let bad people win

8.When it would the change the people around you need

9.When the outcome, you are fighting for, would make feel proud of yourself

10.When doing this might be causing you anxiety, but the destination is something you always wanted to reach

How to Cope with Feelings of Wanting To Give Up On Life

1.Get rid of people who create negative influences in your life
2.Choose to be around People who encourage you, motivate you, inspire you, understand you
3.Join new professional and social groups and participate actively
4.Create your dream board*
5.Organize your relationship, social life, professional life in order*
6.Create a support group of real well-wishers
7.Get people out of your life who only are with you to take advantage of you or for what you can give them or for their any other ulterior motives
8.Seek help to resolve your relationship issues
9.Save money, generate new sources on income*
10.Acquire new skills, get future ready qualifications
11.Do not accept your helplessness, become a seeker of newer ways to solve your problems*
12.Don't sit and brood, be an action person*
13.Do not try to escape by being an ostrich, learn to face yourself*
14.Learn to love yourself*
15.Use the energy of your frustrations transform your life, create complete turnaround
16.Make up your mind to give your 100% and keep trying till you succeed, in all your pursuits of passion
17.If your first solution doesn't work, keep trying like Thomas Edison, while inventing the light-bulb
18.Seek multiple views, explanations and solutions for your problem
19.Go easy with failures, accept that in the journey towards growth, they have to happen
20. Identify what triggers negative thoughts, feelings and emotions and reactions in you, then plan to counter them effectively, next time*
21. People seem to be able to bear or tolerate depression as long as there is the belief that things will improve
22. Learn the NLP techniques of disassociation to look at situation objectively and plan strategically
23. Learn to reframe the meanings of situations, actions, outcomes, people's intentions in positive ways
24.Learn to distinguish between the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. Never give up on something you really want. It's difficult to wait but more painful to regret
25.Understand that for your own mental, emotional and physical well-being, Falling is acceptable, Pain is acceptable, Failure is acceptable – but Quitting is not
26. All the successful people and experts struggled to reach their place
27.If you are burned out, seek help in rejuvenating and turning-around your life* my blogs on these would give you step by step guidance
28. Be clear about WHYs, why you are doing something
29. Simplify your life*
30. Stick to the basics*
31.Learn and develop yourself to make you more comfortable in facing difficult situations and people* more effectively
32. Be realistic and flexible, See if it is time to quit and to try something else
33.If feeling very scared, ask yourself, What's the worst that can happen, and then plan how to counter that in case it is inevitable
34. Understand that Most of the time we are afraid of something is an illusion made up by our reptile brain
35.Understand that it may not be that bad at all
36. Some mind-set correcting thoughts
A.Anything worthwhile takes time, dedication, sacrifice, and effort
B.That negative voice you're listening to doesn't matter
C.Remember what it feels like to complete something, you've probably forgotten that incredible feeling
D.Father time is merciless; it will keep ticking on with or without you. You may as well do something incredible with the time it provides you
E.You might be developing an incredible discipline, needed in future by continuing
F.You might be a lot closer to your goal than you think
G.Life is a lot more fun when you're pro-active moving forward towards a worthwhile goal
H.Understand that If everyone else were doing what you were doing, you'd be nobody, and this is the chance to be your real self
I.If you have failed, you only lost the battle, not the war

If for no reason you are feeling hopeless, helpless, or just down in the dumps – please ask yourself

1.Did you sleep well
2.Did you recently had a setback or failure
3.Did someone did or say anything that has upset you
4.Are you feeling alright or physically, there could be symptoms of fever, cold, flu etc
5.Are you hydrated enough
6.Are you trying to quit an addition, and the feelings that you have are part of the withdrawal syndrome
7.Did you drink more than normal, and it is just the hangover
8.Have you been working late and not having enough rest, break or vacation
9.Are you on any medication, whose side-effects can be the feelings you have
10.Have you been exercising enough or been sitting at a place for long
11.Are you engaged with monotonous work for a long time
12.Are your day is dull routine
13.Are there sudden workload
14.Are you supposed to make a difficult or tough decision
15.Have you been feeling lonely and have not had really enjoyable social outing
16.Is there a problem you are struggling with and are unable to find solutions
17.Are you simply sitting and brooding and making magnifying, without taking any action
18.Have you tried to identify, what these feelings are telling you to change*

In all of the above answers, there are embedded solutions

"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100%. And that's pretty good." - -AUTHOR UNKNOWN

Yes, so once in a while, wanting to give up is normal. But giving up is not okay.

Maybe you're disappointed or tired because you haven't succeeded yet after lots of trials, but don't you give up yet because nothing worth having comes easy.

Giving up makes you lose much more than if you persist.

Instant success is a myth, always. All the successful people have failed hundreds of times, if they chose to give up instead of working harder to reach their goals, they would never have succeeded.

There is always a solution to any problem, you have to only explore, search and find it. The struggles that we go through are, what gives meaning to our lives.

When should you seek help - Keep note of whether you ask yourself the following or feel the following or have very strong intentions about the following

1.Why I am such a failure
2.Why everyone I love does not love me back
3.Why everyone tries to harm me
4.Why no one likes me
5.Why I have such bad luck
6.Why I such an idiot
7.Why I can't do anything
8.Why I am good for nothing
9.Even if I die, nobody will miss me
10.Why should I live
11.The life is not worth living as it only has pain, problems and sorrows
12.What is the point of living anymore
13.So many people would be happy, if I am not there
14.I must move out of this world to make others happy
15.I am always making mistakes
16.You have the feelings of extreme shame, guilt and sorrow over what you have done in the past
17.Feelings of not being wanted or needed by anyone
18.Living with learned helplessness. Many of our setbacks in life can teach us that we are ineffective and that your actions don't have any effect on what happens in your life, we give up trying. This is called learned helplessness. Learned helplessness is associated with depression
19.Feeling hurt always
20. Feeling that as if the entire world is plotting against you
21.When you wake up in the morning and all you are thinking about giving up, and that though stays with you all day

If you have thoughts, feelings and reactions, like the above on constant basis, and they disturb you mentally, emotionally and physically and causes disruption in your normal day to fay life, then you must seek help from qualified, trained and experienced professional, immediately

Finally, if you feel like leaving this world, just consider

1.Death will not relieve the pain, maybe for you[in case you succeed], but for your loved ones it may cause more trouble

2.There is no coming back after you have done it

3.Imagine how your loved ones will feel

4.Even though you feel alone, but there are so many people who love you. Your parents, your teachers, your friends, your family, even people you have never talked to.

5.It will get better.

6.What you are feeling is temporary but suicide is final

7.You are NOT alone.

8.If you kill yourself, if there is a person who is the source of your pain or depression will win

Nick Vujicic - Is It The End?[Complete this part about Nick is taken from the internet]

At 10 years old, he decided to end his life. In his own home. He wanted to drown himself in the bathtub and put an end to his misery.

He told no one. After all, no one can understand the bullying he used to face every day. No one can be in his shoes and feel his pain. No one can explain to him why he was the way he was.

There was no reason for him to keep fighting. He believed that he had all the reasons in the world to give up. To give up on himself and to give up on everything.

He came that day from the school deciding that it's going to be the last day in his life. He told his father that he was going to take a shower and relax in the bathtub.

He didn't want to relax; he wanted to end his life. That was a declaration of giving up. By ending his life, he's telling the world that he had given up on himself and on everything.

As painful as it was, it was not more painful than the current pain that he was feeling.

So, he went to the bathroom to do what he had planned. He got his head under the water, counting the seconds and the minutes while watching his life slips away from him just as he planned.

He might have felt relief at those moments, but just for milliseconds. Because after those milliseconds, he had, while his head was down the water, a thought that made him think twice about what he was doing.

He pictured, as he described it later, his family crying and grieving over his grave. He saw his mother, his father, and his brother crying over his grave. And that was it; it was enough motivation for him to get his head out of the water and take another breath.

"What's worse than having a disabled child? A disabled child who gives up." He describes why he decided to not kill himself at that moment.

He was disabled and those who care about him already got it hard. Why make it harder for them by killing himself?

In fact, he wasn't just disabled. It was worse than that.

He was born with a rare condition that made him disabled. He was born limbless; he was born with no arms and no feet.

And the future for him was dark and unknown. Will he ever manage to lead a normal life, let alone a happy life? Can he work? Will he get married? How is he going to be able to hold his wife's hand or hug his first child?

It was difficult and very depressing. After all, he didn't choose to be this way.

He almost gave up on himself. But at the last moment, he backed off and pulled himself up. Up of the water and up of the depression that he was experiencing.

Nowadays, is not only a role model for a lot of people but also he's happily married and a proud father.

He gives speeches where he gives people hope. Telling people who are going through tough times that if he can do it, they can do it too. Regardless of how difficult the situations are.

He chose to not give up; he chose to believe.

Now You Need to Choose!

There are many and many people who faced adversity and serious setbacks in their lives but didn't give up on themselves. Nick is just an example.

Nick said that what turned him in was the idea of causing pain to his family. Also, he said that he found power and meaning in connecting with God and having faith. He said that he was born this way for a reason, probably to inspire other people and to be a miracle in someone else's life.

"I have a pair of shoe in my closet. Why? I've seen blind people see and deaf people hear. It's fine if you don't believe me, I've got it on camera But I realized something. If God doesn't change my circumstances, he's going to use my life to be a miracle for someone else. When you don't get a miracle, you can still be a miracle for someone else." -Nick Vujicic