How to be a confident person

In this article we will learn the following

- How to be a confident person - 100 tips to take your self-confidence to an effectively much-higher levels - on sustainable basis

-9 beliefs you need to create-accept-inculcate - in order to work on your self-confidence

All of us need to have confidence in ourselves - when we attempt the unknown, the uncertain, and the risky and also downright scary tasks.

Developing self-confidence - is a DOING-SKILL - meaning you can do all of the following but your confidence level will not increase - except giving you a feel-good feeling for a very short time.

1.Watching people who are big-achievers - perform [as a spectator]
2.Listening or watching videos of motivational-speakers Or of people who have defied tremendous odds and have created jaw-dropping and awe-inspiring accomplishments
3.Reading 100s of books-article and self-help guides
4.Repeating or Chanting affirmations
5.Faking the confidence
6.Showing-off the false courage or bravado
7.Dressing in Branded Clothes - Driving Jazzy Cars
8.Hiding behind superiority mask etc.

These external aids - will fail you - at the hint of real danger especially in the most crucial time when you need your self-confidence most.

Your self-confidence can only increase - when you take actions while slowly raising the bar of discomfort and challenges that you handle.

Please first understand that your confidence is part of your core-being and your internal sub-conscious characteristics] - which gets formed through the combination many-many known as well as undiscovered causes.

If you want to learn how to be more confident - you need to learn how to change your mental-emotional-state or mood - Our mood is influenced by how we feel about ourselves at any given time.

Most of the time all the confidence level built through these quick-fixes would disappear in real time scenario.

Your self-confidence can only increase - when you take actions while slowly raising the bar of discomfort and challenges that you handle.

If we lack confidence - it is just not possible to build it by external changes as most motivational experts would have you believe.

100+ tips to take your self-confidence to an effectively much-higher levels - on sustainable basis - it is going to be very-very slow processes and you would initially face insurmountable obstacles and challenges [mostly because of your own internal assumptions/beliefs/ mindset/fears/attitude /perceptions etc.].

1.If we could do the following [not given in any particular order] with dedication and absolute discipline then you would see miracles happening in your life, later at a pace you can never imagine - Our fears, anxieties and butterflies in the stomach would not go away permanently - but you would become comfortable & effective in taking actions that are imperative for your success, happiness and relationships - But only these can give you the best probability of lifting your confidence level to a sustainable one, if you keep on practicing you would see the long term impact and a sense of liberation.
2.Start taking tough decisions after thinking through what is the worst that can happen and creating plans to tackle them if they occur - in case our decision is wrong
3.Be specific about what are you not confident in- list all the places where you lack confidence - when do you feel self-doubt and your negative emotions creeping in - where do you feel your skills or abilities are limiting you - where would you like to have more confidence
4.And then list all the situations, places and people - where you want to have more confidence
5.Uncover what gives you confidence - how can you figure out what gives you confidence - Think about a couple times in your life when you felt most confident -then think about what was about those times that made you feel so empowered - was it the environment you were in - Something you were doing - A feeling you had -The more you get clear about this for yourself, the easier it will be to tap into when you need it most
6.Be true to you - by being brutally honest with you - think about what makes you, uniquely you.
7.When you're trying to be someone you're not - every part of you will resists it subconsciously
8.Accept that you are good-enough - with all your imperfections - we all are
9.Acquire new skills and experiences and abilities
10. Use NLP modelling technique and apply – think about someone you know who exudes confidence. Imagine what that person would do.
11. Surround yourself with people who uplift you, encourage you, make you feel great about yourself and are themselves are an inspiration.
12. Avoid and get rid of all those who drain and zap your confidence or make you feel worthless
13. Even if you are full of doubt and fears - just take the first step right now - if it is something that you need badly and have to be done
14. Be an action person - as action builds confidence and each step you take strengthens it
15. Consciously and proactively seek assignments - where you have go out of your comfort zones and stretch - discover your limits by exposing yourself to different situations and push yourself through discomfort - later start enjoying the thrill
16. Acknowledge, name and feel all your negative and positive emotions including pain and hurts - fully - never try to suppress-avoid-deny - the negative ones
17. Think of past successes- and then visualize your future goals and see yourself accomplishing those vividly - Then plan-prepare-learn and implement your plans
18. Improve your body language always look in the eyes while talking - if you are talking with a group - rotate your eyes and fix it for each person for fraction of second
19. Do something creative - Challenge your limiting beliefs - Be curious to learn-observe-experiment
20. Reach-out to others to get rid of your baggage of past
21. Seek help or work on yourself to heal yourself from your regrets, sadness, grief, shame and buried-anger
22. Stop giving a damn about what others think
23. Let negative and toxic people out of your life
24. Create healthy emotional boundaries
25. Care about your appearance - Groom yourself - dress nicely
26. Accept that failures and mistakes are inevitable part of growth
27. Mentor others - empower others to become their best
28. Know yourself - accept yourself - Love yourself unconditionally
29. Always prepare and practice and learn before attempting any big task
30. Speak slower with emphasis on important words - vary your tone
31. Be a good listener - Learn to manage your insecure-urge of talking more and more in any gathering
32. Set a small-small goals and achieve them on every day basis
33. Change a small yet negative and harmful habit
34. Always Focus-on and look-for solutions
35. Learn to negotiate when you feel like complaining
36. Volunteer for causes to help the underprivileged
37. Exercise - be physically and mentally active and fit
38. Empower yourself with knowledge - do lot of research and studying
39. Get organized
40. Proactively seek crucial & challenging responsibilities
41. Continuously improve whatever you do repeatedly
42. Develop and practice the art of humor - Learn to laugh at your own mistakes but create the mind-frame of never repeating the same
43. Be humble and polite - Arrogance, ego, aggressiveness and anger are the qualities displayed by the insecure, submissive and weak people
44. Create the habit of recognizing the contributions of others and thanking them
45. Make it part of your nature to accept, apologize and correct your mistakes
46. Learn continuously to increase your knowledge and awareness
47. Taking calculated risk - disrupt your routine
48. Develop hobbies that makes you stretch far beyond your comfort zones
49. Join & participate actively in your professional circle
50. Volunteer in social activities
51. Everyday taking action towards your powerful dreams
52. Identify and get rid of all the people who drain you, put you down, insult you and make you feel worthless - irrespective of who they are as these people are never going to be your well wishers
53. Practice to say NO to your own temptations and impulses and instant gratifications
54. Practice assertiveness [see our article on assertiveness]
55. Identify your core values and standing up for them
56. Not compromising with excellence, always doing & delivering your best by giving your 100%
57. Before any major assignment, job, test, examination or venture – planning, learning, practicing till fully comfortable
58. Look for change in a proactive manner and making yourself prepared to face the worst
59. Learn creative ways of solving problems
60. Keeping yourself physically active, healthy & fit
61. Learn to visualize and anchor powerful positive emotions for changing your moods in an instant
62. Use few NLP techniques like reframing to change the belief
63. Start competing only with yourself & ensuring that you are working on yourself always
64. Consciously work on to negate/let go of your desires of being approved, appreciated, applauded, admired, accepted, recognized, respected and rewarded by others
65. Learn to be happy for other's success and accomplishments - Helping others to grow
66. Slowly forcing yourself not expect anything from others
67. Ensure that you tackle the toughest of task at the time of your utmost level of energy and enthusiasm
68. Ensure that irrespective of the number of times you fall & fail, every time to get up, improvise and try again till you succeed in your objectives
69. Always surround yourself with people who are smarter, more knowledgeable, more intelligent, more qualified, and more competent than yourself and are people who are always optimistic and on the go people
70. Refine your communication and conversation skills to the highest level by mastering not only the language but also the subject and awareness level
71. Always try to look at any issue from different perspectives
72. Never settle for the first impression and first solution - but going for deeper meanings by exploring all the possible alternatives, possibilities and options that you can find
73. Make yourself operate only from your area of control which means - taking action in whatever is possible for you in this instant, in especially those things, which seems impossible right now
74. Keep a log of your learnings from your failures and mistakes
75. Also keep a note of what you could have improved in your success stories
76. Identifying and accepting your weaknesses & strengths and starting to love, respect and accept yourself unconditionally [see our article on how to love yourself unconditionally]
77. Learn to deliver more than you promise
78. Learn to act like a professional [see our blog on this]
79. Create a log-book of all your blessings like your family support and others
80. Identify and focus on the most important of your priorities as per your life's dreams and passions
81. Learn to express your views & opinions using "I" statements
82. Learn to take the personal responsibilities & ownership for your actions and life
83. Learn & Practice the art of asking questions - and asking uncomfortable and tough questions of yourself as well as others
84. Practice asking questions whenever in doubt, even it means sounding dumb. It really does not matter as no one really thinks anyone dumb-unless they are themselves ignorant
85. Listen to understand and not to reply and one-up-man-ship
86. Start a process to forgive all those who have hurt you in the past - for your own wellbeing
87. Compare with others [if you must] only for identifying the areas to improve as bench-marking for creating improvement
88. Focus more on happiness rather than materialistic or superficial issues
89. Take pride who you are and what you do, all the tasks are equally important
90. If you are feeling lost and don't know what to do - do nothing
91. Take actions towards all that you are feeling guilt for and ensure that your lists of regrets becomes shorter
92. Experiment with new ideas, experiences and create powerful memories
93. Find a mentor and create a solid support network for yourself
94. 9 beliefs you need to create-accept-inculcate - in order to work on your self-confidence
I.Accept that you don't need to fix everything
II.Accept that you don't have to control others to be seen powerful
III.Accept that you don't need other's approval to do your job their way, but that you must do what is right as per your values
IV.Accept that you don't have to prove anything to anyone
V.Accept that you don't have to do things to please others
VI.Accept that you have do as per your passion
VII.Accept that if you are failing it is just because you do not have the skills & competence to handle this at this moment. Learn and fill the gap and then go back to the task again
VIII.Believe that you worthy of happiness
IX.Embrace your imperfections
95. 14 tips on How to Tackle Self-Sabotage Behaviors and Thought Patterns That Undermine Our Self-Confidence
I.Examine your thoughts and yourself in how many ways they are self-sabotaging you

II.Examine your behavior which leads to self-sabotaging actions

III.Understand the reasons why you self-sabotage

IV.Stop comparing yourself with people who seemingly have more material possessions or are happy, instead focus on making yourself equipped with the skills, knowledge, qualifications, experience and attitude that would make you realize your dreams
V.Learn the suitable ways to manage your stress
VI.Do more of the things that you enjoy
VII.Set yourself a challenge that you can realistically complete
VIII.Spend more time with those you hold near and dear
IX.Do the right thing rather than doing things the right way
X.Replace the perfectionism within you and go for excellence
XI.Be your own best friend
XII.Create personal boundaries
XIII.Involve yourself in creative interests
XIV.Learn to deal with your fear through deep breathing & EFT, read about it in our blog how to make fear, fear-you

ALSO READ - 25 Thought Processes, Habits and Beliefs of Happy, Blissful and Confident people - http://relationshipandhappiness.com/latest-posts/thought-processes-habits-and-beliefs-of-happy-blissful-and-confident-people.html & 37 Qualities of a confident man PLUS 22 Signs of a Confident Women AND things that Confident & Classy Women Would Never do - http://relationshipandhappiness.com/latest-posts/signs-of-confident-men-and-women.html

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