Train yourself mentally to expect the unexpected
In this article you will learn
- -11 ways to Condition you mentally and emotionally -to expect the unexpected
- -11 ways to Manage your expectations better to handle crises better
- -11 ways of Managing the worst case scenarios [should they happen] through understanding the world war-II – terminology of - BOHICA, FUBAR, SNAFU,SUSFU and TARFU and how they help us face the unexpected in life especially in the Covid19 - and action plans based on these
- -60+ Tips on dealing with the unexpected more efficiently and effectively
- -Identify out of these 9 ways -how do you react, respond and cope with surprises and unexpected events
- -34 Practices to make you adept in handling disasters in your life – start small – few ways you can do this
Great Leaders, Successful and Happy People - know that they might not be able to control everything - but that they must take the lead in all types of unexpected, in all types of uncertainties, in all types of ambiguities – and through the realm of unknown.
In today's' time where this covid19 pandemic is creating economic catastrophic for countries, organization's as well as individuals – it is only about taking corrective actions - when we don't know what to do.
When everything is sailing smoothly - we can delegate more and focus on creating strategy and vision - but when it is VUCA time – we need to be facing the fire at the front.
We have to remember that even though the clouds of uncertainty and ambiguity have made the future opaque - the horizon is only in the future – door of which is in our present.
In these turbulent times – any decision - when you don't know what to do is the Right Decision—till it prove itself as a bad decision - when that happens - then it's time to reflect, analyze and course-correct.
Hardest part about taking a decision is accepting the consequences and all outcome as our own responsibility.
We not only have to plan after thinking thoroughly – BUT – also need to reach decision and executing it immediately – while determining both direction and velocity.
Then improvising and pivoting -in case it proves to be a lost cause.
11 ways to Condition you mentally and emotionally -to expect the unexpected – following points may give you the directions
- 1.Accept that the days for a job for life is over
- 2.Accept that unexpected things will happen - these could be small things affecting just your day-to-day life – or - these could be significant changes impacting your entire life
- 3.Accept that nobody is immune from unexpected events in life
- 4.Accept that everyday our competencies, skills, experience and expertise is become outdated
- 5.We need to make our yesterday obsolete by acquiring new today's needed - competencies, skills, experience and expertise
- 6.Plus we also need to identify our learning-plan for future-focused competencies, skills, experience and expertise
- 7.We should make ourselves mentally and emotionally prepared – to do any job, any place at any time – the fixed job place and time has become almost extinct except in few manufacturing and service jobs
- 8.Some of these changes will be by choice to pursue better pay or prospects, but others may be forced by unforeseen circumstances, such as closures or layoffs.
- 9.While we may not be able to predict how the future would turn out into – we can always start our preparations for all contingencies that may happen.
- 10.Creativity cannot flourish if we keep seeing only the things we expect to see. If we want to be creative, we must keep ourselves surprised; we must embrace uncertainty and actively look for the unexpected. But how we can achieve that? Isn't that an inherent contradiction: how can we expect the unexpected?
- 11.Learn to be surprised – expect the things to change without any notice
11 ways to Manage your expectations better to handle crises better
- 1.Instead of attaching yourself with a particular result or outcome - banish the unnecessary stress which comes from taking actions expecting a certain result - - unrealistic expectations creates illusions
- 2.Own your choices, decisions and actions AND their resulting consequences
- 3.Stop living your life trying to please other people - because it is like chasing a moving target – and most hopeless cause
- 4.Trying to satisfy and please everyone - we end pleasing no one — ourselves included. By trying to please everyone,
- 5.We are in for biggest disappointments - when we make decisions based on how others expect us to perform - this we do to gain respect and appreciation - this is a losing proposition from the start
- 6.Recalibrate your expectations - as when our expectations are unrealistic, they create bigger problem
- 7.Understand that there is always this gap between what people expect from you and who you are - this is a recipe for frustration for all people
- 8.Understand that no one owes you anything - once you understand this - you won't expect people to owe you anything either
11 ways of Managing the worst case scenarios [should they happen] through understanding the world war-II – terminology of - BOHICA, FUBAR, SNAFU,SUSFU and TARFU and how they help us face the unexpected in life especially in the Covid19 - and action plans based on these
- 1.Acquire the skills and mindset of cynics and become the devil's advocate – to assume that worst may happen – and then go ahead and make plans to deal with them effectively
- 2.Understand the world war-II – terminology – this is what many of us are going through right now
- I.BOHICA -Bend Over, Here It Comes again
- II.FUBAR - Fucked/Fouled Up Beyond All Recognition/Any Repair/All Reason)
- III.SNAFU - Situation Normal All Fucked Up
- IV.SUSFU - Situation Unchanged: Still Fucked Up)
- V.TARFU -Totally And Royally Fucked Up or Things Are Really Fucked Up
- 3.Revisit, review and incorporate newer actions - if these keep happening - over and over again
- 4.What would you do - to either mitigate or avoid to survive - if the worst happens
- 5.Plan should the worst-case scenario happens– how we will survive with enough energy to bounce back
- 6.Understand that this is not to demotivate - but are based on the concept that considering all possible scenarios is the solution for better quality of results
- 7.Be mentally ready to pivot fast when our implementation and strategy fails – and improvising on the feet is the key
- 8.If you identify the unexpected events that took place in your life in past - ask what control you had over any of impacts, outcomes and results
- 9.Also ask yourself - how did you survive - what did you do - how did you discover this action-steps and solutions
- 10.In many cases if we plan early - we might avoid few of the unexpected events
- 11.In many situation - we may not have any control over some unexpected events, circumstances and situations – we need to condition and train ourselves to - emotionally bounce back faster
60+ Tips on dealing with the unexpected more efficiently and effectively
- 1.Start expecting the unexpected as a regular thought-process - like war-time generals - so as to toughen yourself mentally
- 2.Pay attention, observe and start looking for the extraordinary in the ordinary
- 3.Identify your very own stressors - think about the things that make you very stressed out – there are many of typical stressors which are only yours
- 4.Stressors can lead us to negative behaviors such as screaming, thinking-irrationally and losing focus from the main-thing in the chaos
- 5.Planning how do we channelize the negative energies of these un-resourceful and emotionally draining emotions
- 6.We also need to learn to manage our harmful outbursts, angers and triggers
- 7.Take proactive control over your life and manage your life - don't let others' expectations define how you live
- 8.When in crisis - forget about your glass being full, half or empty – accept that it is broken - when we accept and understand that the glass is broken – we stop wallowing in sorrow as our expectations make us suffer
- 9.Accept the reality and face the facts - as pretending that things will go our way creates unnecessary stress
- 10.Life is a fragile glass - it will have cracks and breaks sooner or later
- 11.Learn to enjoy life - when it is good - till it lasts
- 12.Take actions which makes you feel good
- 13.Prepare well for any major action - preparations needed for us to mentally, physically, emotionally and financially prepare ourselves to handle the unexpected better
- 14.We need to create practice of not reacting immediately on impulsive thoughtless reactions
- 15.We have to focus on finding solutions and taking actions to solve the problems we are facing- rather than - wallowing in our crisis and loss
- 16.If you have a plan ready to tackle this unanticipated situation – then just execute the plan – if it fails - then improvise in the best manner that you can AND again take
- 17.Face and acknowledge your emotions and feeling that will eventually happen – when unexpected crisis of high magnitude strikes
- 18.Identify out of these 9 ways -how do you react, respond and cope with surprises and unexpected events
- I.Do you become stressed
- II.Do you panic
- III.Do you get flustered
- IV.Do you become angry
- V.Do you freeze into inaction
- VI.Do you give-up
- VII.Do you become a bulldozer to road roll everyone
- VIII.Do you run away or try to escape
- IX.Do you go into denial mode
- 19.Choose a proper stress, crisis, upsets, frustration and anger management strategy – suited to you
- 20.When making a plan, always have an alternate plan – keeping in mind - the important variables and assumptions
- 21.If what happened is irreversible - think introspect and identify - where and how we are going to go from this situation.
- 22.Once we have done that – we need to identify - either how to adjust to the new situation or how to fix it or how to improve it or make the most of it.
- 23.Take the initiative, and introduce small changes into your life – deliberately – just be comfortable with the feelings of being in discomfort
- 24.Learning to be emotionally detached is important-this helps us view the situation as objectively as we can manage at that time and therefore, be in a better position to deal with whatever is happening in our life
- 25.Cultivate a broad network of relationships
- 26.Learn to satisfy your soul rather than your social circle
- 27.Identify – in spite of all the negativities – which are still the blessings – difficult to identify BUT there are many
- 28.Help others – who are going through worse fate than yours
- 29.Put your oxygen mask first -to be able to take care of others optimally - you have to put on your oxygen mask first — that is addressing your needs before attending others. – use following guidelines
- 30.Know yourself better and Accept yourself as you are (flaws included)
- 31.Adjust the way you think - you cannot control what others think about you, but you can choose how you talk to yourself
- 32.Express yourself -speak up
- 33.Set healthy boundaries around yourself - people need limits
- 34.Stop judging - life is not perfect — removing expectations will let you appreciate your life as is
- 35.The best way to handle our emotional hot-buttons - is to consciously prepare for them to happen – and trying out newer ways to make you more effective in handling them
- 36.Sometimes when it gets too overwhelming – practice faith. If you are too angry take it on GOD
- 37.Practice to build resilience – by not only making a checklist for what to do but practicing ahead of time - this drill has to get deeply wired into your sub-conscious
- 38.34 Practices to make you adept in handling disasters in your life – start small – few ways you can do this
- I.Identify one scenario where you might have to act quickly in response to a potential catastrophe
- II.Ask what all would equip you best to handle – all the tools, all the networks, all the helpline, all the practices, all the people, all the checklist – this will have to be updated regularly
- III.Then you rehearse the skills ahead of time and prepare your safety nets and resources. Practice using different tools, doing newer and difficult things – making yourself an all-rounder
- IV.Once you have become adept in handling small crises - identify a more challenging scenario
- V.Again create a list of all those you would do - if all the resources, help and aid are available what – then identify and collect these
- VI.Again, you can't control everything - if an accident occurs, there will still be much uncertainty - but preparing to the extent that you can becomes part of your resilience.
- VII.Now go to next level by identifying another more difficult situation – this is prudent to anticipate what you can and to see yourself acting competently through real time practice
- VIII.Creating external safety nets of resources — logistical, financial, relational — is part of strengthening your resilience
- IX.Preparing a safety net in the brain- is just as essential.
- X.Rehearsing for the many "weather conditions" of life is skillful resilience building.
- XI.In the face of the unexpected – once you are able to -assess your actual options. Don't waste time wishing things were different or trying to force-fit your previous plan to the new, unforeseen situation
- XII.Start with a blank slate - think about the outcome you want given the new situation, the information you have at hand, and the resources available. Then clearly identify and accept your newer priorities and immediate goals
- XIII.No matter how much preparation we do – we will still face situations for which we are unprepared – that is why becoming comfortable acting in the face of the unanticipated could become your competitive advantage
- XIV.Understand that there is an almost defined series of stages we go through – during our transition from shock to being able to take controlled decisions and actions. Follow the given guidelines
- XV.Normally the first thing you'll experience is shock and unbelief - this is a stage of confusion and fear and a certain dose of denial
- XVI.Then accepting the situation – but still being unnerved and feeling lost
- XVII.Then becoming calm – at this stage – we need to sort out and differentiate between emotions and facts
- XVIII.Then we need to understand the situation by asking questions – to get back to facing and taking action and becoming empowered enough to deal with the problem
- XIX.All the big problems have to be broken down into small-small manageable pieces – we have to solve them in stages.
- XX.Remember you don't have to have all the answers - you have to find answers for that particular stage only
- XXI.Make room for the new reality - review your priorities. Your life is changed now. You'll need to make adjustments – some big, other small. Some things will have to go, and others will have to change.
- XXII.Do your research - gather the facts that will make the situation clearer. Your emotions will fight the changes. You might feel angry and frustrated.
- XXIII.Some of the changes will be permanent. But they can turn out to be positive ones. Often people create new habits and a healthier lifestyle after a serious disease. Unhealthy relationships can be over, and that is painful at the time
- XXIV.Do nothing - whatever you do, do not panic – if you are scared then please understand that - no one is so brave that he is not disturbed by something unexpected
- XXV.Stay optimistic – by recalling your past when you overcame a situation
- XXVI.Execute your plan - Focus on the big picture -Evaluate what can be done to prevent the problem in future
- XXVII.Understand that uncertainty is the only certainty – and change is the only constant
- XXVIII.Trust in your ability to bounce back
- XXIX.We are sure to face ups and downs in life - as life is full of surprises and unexpected turns just like a roller coaster.
- XXX.While certain situations are beyond our control - there are definitely steps we can take to be ready for change
- XXXI.It definitely could not be your hidden genius which reveals itself to you suddenly - what you should do in totally unexpected circumstances, changes and situations- it being prepared thoroughly for almost all possible worst scenarios
- XXXII.Learn and practice solving problems of every nature – yours as well as others PLUS the one you are not connected with BUT solve it make yourself get into problem solving mode automatically
- XXXIII.Learn to generate multiple choices, options, possibilities, solutions, perspectives – whenever facing a bigger challenge than you can comfortably handle
- XXXIV.Exercise your body along with mind – keep yourself fit
- 39.Few possible worst scenarios which happens to many of us CAN HAPPEN IN THIS POST CORONA COVID19 world
- I.Death(s) of any / all earning member(s) of a family
- II.Loss of job for an indefinite period
- III.Disability of the breadwinner or family members from an accident
- IV.Old age health ailments
- 40.Start preparing for contingencies now – from wherever you are and whatever minimum you can
- I.Build a cash reserve to cushion against a long period of unemployment - one of the most unexpected events that can throw your finances out of gear can be a loss of job.
- II.Health insurance cover for old age health ailments and also being ready for - Disability and long-term illness
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