Our Attitude Towards Money and Quality Of Our Relationships


How Our Attitude Towards Money Impacts & Shapes The Quality Of Our Relationships

​Although This Article Is Skewed Towards Couple's Relationship – Although The Broader Aspects Is Applicable On All Other Relationships As Well.

We Have Attitudes, Beliefs, Mindsets, Perceptions, Genetic Coding & Conditioning For How We Think, How We Act ,Whatever We Do Plus How & Why We React In A Particular Way.

Why Relationship Gets Sours, Dis-Satisfaction Develops, Has Conflicts, Weakens, Breaks – Can Have Combination Of Many Small & Big Issues/Reasons, But Few Of These Could Any Of The Following Or A Combination Of Some These As Well As Additional Causes Not Included Here

  • 1.Compatibility Issues/Causes
  • A.Inability/Not Try To Understand Others Perspectives/Views/ Opinions
  • B.Not Resolving Conflicts In A Healthy Way/Ignoring Conflicts
  • C.Not Making Efforts - Only Expecting Others Work for Relationship
  • D.Physical Incompatibility – Unmatched Libido
  • E.Intellectual Incompatibility
  • F.Emotional Mis-Fit/Immaturity
  • 2.Personality Issues
  • A.Having Different Love Personality/ Love Expectations
  • B.Having Different Money Persona
  • C.Having Conflicting Psychological Attributes
  • D.Psychological Dis-Order In One Of The Partners
  • E.Different Communication Temperament
  • F.Expectation Mis-Match

Today We Would Be Talking About Your Relationship With Materialistic World & Money

"Just Like Your Physical Relationship Is About Much More Than Sex, And Your Emotional Relationship Is About Far More Than Your Feelings, Your Money Relationship Involves A Whole Lot More Than Your Money," The Palmers Write.


Your Relationship With Money Affects Your Happiness – Money May Not Buys Happiness Directly, It Certainly Affects Our Happiness.

If You Don't Care about Money and Spend Recklessly, Conversely If You Focus Too Much On Money, You Would Never Seems To Get Enough Of It

Our Relationship With Money Is About How We Interact And Relate To Money In Our Lives.

This Relationship Is Very Important – In Some Countries Like USA This Is Probably The No. 1 Reason For Separation, Divorce & Fights.

Even In Professional Life Our Relationship With Money Affects Our Growth – Both Negatively & Positively.

It also affects the type of relationship we have socially & in our families along with friends & near and dear ones

If You Change Job For Money Alone Fast intitially– You Find Yourself Stagnated – As After Sometimes Organizations May Not Select You, Because Of Your Frequent Movement

In Business If You Take Shortcuts To make Money Fast May Harm You Adversely In Long Run.

Difference In Money Personality Or Rather What Is Your Attitude Towards Money Affects Your Major Relationships – Especially Marital.

One Of The Most Frustrating Experience Would Be To Have A Partner Who Has A Contrasting Money Mind Set, Than Yourself.

It Could Be An Exasperating Experience To Convert Your Spouse To Your Way Of Thinking – For The Simple Reason It Is Not Possible – Nor For You To Change Others Or For Others To Change You.

Let Us Understand How People Relate To Money As Per There Attitude Towards Materialistic World – There Could Be Following Type Of People

1.Reckless Big Spenders – They Live In Present And Spend On Whatever Impulse They Have. There Are People Who Within Days Of Getting A Big Amount Are Back To Credit Card/Looking To Borrow

2.Misers – Even If They Have Enough Money, They Still Do Not Spend On Even The Basic Necessities – There Are Numerous Cases, Where After Death Of A Seemingly Poor Person – They Had Hoarded A Large Amount To Have Lived Their Life Lavishly

3.Then There Are People Who Save Money For Future & Also Take Care To Live Comfortably

4.Then There Are Gamblers – Who Take Big Risk & These People Have Roller Coaster Life & See-Saw Between Luxury & Misery

5.Then There Are People Are Obsessed On Making Money By Only Means

6.Then There Are People Who Dislike/Hate The Concept Of Having Money – As They Believe The Money Causes All The Evils

Sometimes You May Find Some Or All Of The Above Personality Types In A Family.

Larry Burkett, Noted Financial Author, Says, "Money Is Either The Best Or The Worst Area Of Communication In Our Marriages."

So If You Are Married And Have Money Fights, You Are Normal.But If This Is A Real Problem Area For You, There Is Also An Opportunity To Improve Your Relationship And Maybe Even Reach Agreement With Your Spouse.

So What Should Be Done

First Understand The Biggest Myth:We Should Avoid Talking About Money As It Causes Frictions And Fights – Which Should Be Avoided For Better Relationship.

The Fact:You Can't Have A Great Relationship Until You Can Communicate And Reach Agreement About Money & About Every Areas Of Conflicts Openly.

Tips For Making Relationships & Life Great

If You Can Be Open About Money Matters It Can Teach You To Resolve All Other Areas Of Conflict More Effectively, By Bringing The Unsaid Conflicts Into Open.

Make The Resolve & Have The Courage To Do The Following

  • 1.Understand Your Money Personality – From Among The Six Above
  • 2.Understand Your Partners Attitude About Money
  • 3.Identify & Talk Openly About Both Attitudes
  • 4.Sit Together And Identify The Future Life Goals Together That Are Impending As Well As Both Of You Would Love To Have
  • 5.Create A Earning, Saving, Investing Plan & Each Of The Family Members Role
  • 6.Every Month Discuss On A Particular Day Your Current & Future Priorities, Expenses & Corrections In Plan If Needed
  • 7.Learn About The Ways To Save – Say For Example Read & Follow Warren Buffets 7 Rules & Similar Experts
  • 8.Resolve To Stop Unnecessary Impulsive Spending
  • 9.Always Review Your Investments & Change Them
  • 10.Sometimes If A Male Earns Less Than His Wife => If The Husband Is Egoist It Can Lead To Solid Jealousy & Suppression => Which Ultimately Will Lead To Unhappy Life As Well As May Result In Catastrophic Tensions, Separation. It Can Happen From Wife's Side As Well Is She Has The Notion That She Should Be Treated On A Pedestal, because she is earning more => This Is Very Dangerous Ground & Needs Expert Counseling
  • 11.If Both Are Money MindedThen You Have To Have Clear Cut Agreement About The Expenses, Liabilities, Pre-Nuptial Agreement, Joint Bank Accounts, Loans, Shared/Joint Credit-Card Payments Etc – Documented Officially. So That In Case Of Separation – One Does Not End Up With Major Share Of Liabilities. In This Scenario Do Not Sign Anything You Don't Understand. In Case Of Joint Loans – When You Become The Guarantor For Spouse Or Family Members, Clarify The Repayment Part In Case Of Default
  • 12.Understand Certain Facts & Create Openness & Understanding About The Following
  • A.If You Grew Up Poor, You May Be More Impulsive Than If You Had A More Affluent Family + You May Feel Compelled To Surround Yourself With Brand Names And Possessions
  • B.Materialistic Couples Aren't As Happy – They May Have More Money
  • C.Couples Who Focus On Money And Possessions Don't Communicate Well
  • D.Materialistic Couples Have More Problems & Poorer Quality Relationship Themselves As Well As Others
  • E.Many Couples Believe That If Only They Had More Money, Life Would Be Easier And Their Relationship Would Improve - But That May Not Be The Case

I Have Found That If I Focus On The Happiness Of The Family's Interests My Materialistic Desires Reduces Plus I Become More In Touch With My Real Needs And As A Result I Use Use As A Means Rather Than An End By Itself

The Sooner You Realize That Money Is Not The Answer, The Sooner You'll Be At Peace. I Think The Key To Discover What Truly Makes You Happy.

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