Life's myths and the choices we have

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Busting Myths on Success, Leadership, Happiness, Love and Relationship, Business, Parenting

Here we would cover, ​The Most Popular Myths and THE TRUTHS in Success, Leadership, Happiness, Love & Relationship, Parenting, Business

We Have Been Conditioned To Believe In Myths [As In Legend] & the Fiction [As In Illusion/Fabrication] => So Much & So That We Many Times Confuse It With The Truth [As In Fact/Reality/Accuracy]

Today We Will Explore What Is The Fact & What Is Our Belief About The Myths Which We Treat As Facts.

Imagine Few Situations


1.You Are Late - & - You Are Waiting For Bus No. 309 => All The Buses In That Stops Comes 3 Times But Not 309, But Opposite Side You Can see three 309s Go Together

2.You Know A Certain Train Always Gets Delayed And You Only Start A Few Minutes Later Than You Would have Started for the Correct Time & When You Reach The Station – You Find Of All The Days This Train Has Come On Correct Time & Left And Other Trains Are Delayed

3.You Are In A Traffic Jam – But You Find That Your Lane Is Not Moving, All Others Are Moving. You Manage To Change Your Lane To The Moving One – Now You Find That This Lane Has Stopped Moving & The Lane You Were In Start Moving At A Fast Speed

4.You Go To Bank – You Choose A Line With Very Few People In The Queue – Avoiding The Ones With Large Queue – But You Find That The Persons Who Came After You In The Long Queue Are Already Served And Gone But You Are Still Waiting

Welcome to the Father Murphy's Laws => I Am a Firm Believer of This Law Myself. As I Plan All My Actions Based On These.

It Is Also Termed As the Law of Attraction, and Has Become As Popular.

This Law States That Whatever Can Go Wrong Will Go Wrong. And It Happens Not Because This Law Has A Godly Power – But Actually Because => We Are Somehow Programed To Notice Bad Things – Whenever We Are Stressed As When Things Go Bad, We Look For Reasons.

We Often Fail To Notice When Whatever is Happening As Per Our Expectations & Whenever Life Goes Well => Only Because We Feel That Things Should Always Work Out In Our Favor, All The Time. Therefore it is Taken for Granted & Goes Unnoticed

Few Off-Shoots Of "Murphy's Law" Collected From The Internet

1.If There Is A Possibility Of Several Things Going Wrong, The One That Will Cause The Most Damage Will Be The One To Go Wrong.

2.If There Is A Worse Time For Something To Go Wrong, It Will Happen Then.

3.If You Perceive That There Are Four Possible Ways In Which A Procedure Can Go Wrong, And Circumvent These, Then A Fifth Way, Unprepared For, Will Promptly Develop.

4.If Everything Seems To Be Going Well, You Have Obviously Overlooked Something.

5.Nature Always Sides With The Hidden Flaw.

6.Whenever You Set Out To Do Something, Something Else Must Be Done First.

7.Every Solution Breeds New Problems.

8.Enough Research Will Tend To Support Your Theory.

9.When There Is A Very Long Road Upon Which There Is A One-Way Bridge Placed At Random, And There Are Only Two Cars On That Road, It Follows That: (1) The Two Cars Are Going In Opposite Directions, And (2) They Will Always Meet At The Bridge.

10.Smile... Tomorrow Will Be Worse.

11.Left To Themselves, Things Tend To Go From Bad To Worse.

12.You Never Run Out Of Things That Can Go Wrong.

13.No Battle Plan Ever Survives Contact With The Enemy

14.If Your Advance Is Going Well, You Are Walking Into An Ambush

15.The Only Thing More Accurate Than Incoming Enemy Fire Is Incoming Friendly Fire.

16.Logic Is A Systematic Method Of Coming To The Wrong Conclusion With Confidence.

17.If Builders Built Buildings The Way Programmers Wrote Programs, Then The First Woodpecker That Came Along Would Destroy Civilization.

18.An Expert Is One Who Knows More And More About Less And Less Until He Knows Absolutely Everything About Nothing.

19. A Meeting Is An Event At Which The Minutes Are Kept And The Hours Are Lost.

I Actually Plan Almost All My Projects Based On Murphy's Law & Explore All The Possibilities That Can Go Wrong & Prepare For That. I Also Keep The Above 3rd Point In Mind – That Whatever I Have Not Considered – May Go Wrong.

This Gives Me to Advantage to Focus On the Things That Goes Wrong – Which Was Not taken into Planning

MYTHS ABOUT SUCCESS


1.Overnight Success Theory

2.Being Lucky Enough To Be In The Right Place At The Right Time

3.Qualifications From The Coveted Institutions

4.Having A Godfather

5.Have Very High IQ, EQ, SQ Etc Etc

6.They Are Share Same Types Of Traits & Habits

7.The Problems I Face Today – These Successful People Never Had To Face

8.Success Makes You Happier


MYTHS ABOUT LEADERSHIP


1.They Are Charismatic

2.They Are Extroverted

3.They Were Born Leaders

4.They Have Solutions For All The Problems

5.They Do Not Make Mistakes Like We Do

6.They Are Not Scared – They Are Fearless

7.They Are The Epitome Of Positivity

8.The Schools[As In Universities] Produces Leaders

9.All Leaders Are Popular


THE FACTS

IN RANDOM ORDER ABOUT BOTH SUCCESS & LEADERSHIP


1.Leaders Are Born And Not Made => Leaders Are Almost Always Made By Their Circumstances. When It Comes To The Corporate World, You Can Polish Leadership Skills By Consistent Efforts & Practices

2.Leaders Know Everything=> Many Of The Time It Is Like Doctors – In Face Of Partial Information – They Have To Take Decisions On Their Gut Feelings

3.Leaders Are Failproof => Leaders Don't Fail & Make Mistakes Like All People The Fact They Commit More Mistakes Than All Of Us Because They Take More Decisions –But They Apply The Lessons Learned From Their Mistakes

4.Leaders Are Charismatic=> They Acquire Charismatic Halo Because Of Their Hard Work, Integrity, Ideas, And Commitment, Actions & Results

5.Leaders Have Impressive Personalities => Leaders Create The Ability To Influence People Without Using Power & Authority

6.Leadership Can Be Learned At Management Schools=> Leadership Is Is Action & Attitude And It Is Not About Not About Knowledge.

7.Leaders Are Extroverted => Many Iconic Leaders Are Introverted

8.They Are Positive Thinkers => They Are Actually Realistic Thinkers & Have Lot Of Common Sense

9.They Have Common Habits & Traits => On Every Iconic Leader's Habit A Different Book Can Be Written As They Have As Different Habits As There Could Be Excepting That They All Work Hard

10.Overnight Success => Behind Each Overnight Success Story There Are Years Of Persistent Toil, Failures, Mistakes, Efforts Ete Etc

11. Success Will Make All Your Problems Go Away - American Motivational Speaker Jim Rohn Summed It Up, "Don't Wish It Was Easier, Wish You Were Better. Don't Wish For Less Problems, Wish For More Skills. Don't Wish For Less Challenge, Wish For More Wisdom." Successful People Don't Have Fewer Problems, They Just Search & Evolve Newer Strategies - Problems Are Necessary On The Road To Success -To Continue Being Successful, They Still Have To Continue To Solve Problems -- Bigger Ones. That's Right, The More Successful You Are, The Bigger Your Problems Will Be. 

12. Success Will Make You Happier => "Money Won't Make You Happy," Said Author Zig Ziglar, Money Can Indeed Buy You Some Happiness, But It Is Only Short-Term. It Is Not Long-Term Happiness On A Deep, Satisfying Level.

MYTHS ABOUT BUSINESS


1.You Have To Be Cheaper

2.Just Because You Are Good At Something – You Can Launch Business

3.Your Idea Is A Cool One – Nobody Has Thought About It Before

4.The Moment You Launch It – People Will Come Running To You To Give You Their Money

5.Starting The Business Is The Best Way To Get Rich Fast - You Can Be Vacationing, Living A Life Of Luxury Within No Time

6.You Will Be Your Own Boss

7.You Should Do All Jobs From Doorman To Chairman – In The Initial Periods

8.Your Total Business Should Come As A Surprise At The Time Of Launch

9.You Need To Take Many Huge Risk

10.If We Send Mass Mail/Message On The Social Media – We Will Be Overnight Success

11.It Is All About Product – Not About Beating Competitors – It Is About Having Great Features

12.Few Giant Customers Is All That We Need

13.Right Now Spending Money Is Important – We Will Worry About Cash In-Flow Later

14.Start Ups Should Not Go For Top Talents

Now These Should Give You An Idea – Why Only 1 Out Of 10,000 Start-Up Survives & 1 Out Of 1,00,000 Succeeds In Long Term.

MYTH ABOUT HAPPINESS

1. Marriage Will Make You Happy 
2. Job Will Make You Happy 
3. Children Will Make You Happy 
4. If You Are Not Happy In Marriage – Having Extra-Marital Affair Will Make You Happy 
5. Higher Salary, Promotion Will Make You Happy 
6. Money Will Make You Happy 
7. Power Will Make You Happy
 8. Position Will Make You Happy
 9. Bigger Car, Bigger House & Bigger Everything Will Make You Happy 
10. Once You Settle Down It Will Make You Happy
11. Falling In Love Will Make You Happy 
12. You Will Be Happy – Once You Reach/Achieve/Get……..
13.As Soon As I Graduate, I'll Be Happy.

14.As Soon As I Finish This Next Work Project, I'll Be Happy

15.As Soon As We Get Our Car, I'll Be Happy.

The Facts About Happiness

1.Why We do not experience Happiness – as we keep waiting The Next Milestone To Happen.

2.Happiness Is About Being Able To Enjoy The Journey, Recognizing & Being Grateful To The Blessings That You Have, Relish Each Small Things/Moments In Relationship, Love => Can Give You Happiness.

3.Expecting Changes, Uncertainty & Being Flexible To Adopt Is Another Way You Can Be Happy

4.Hoping For/Looking For The Light At The End Of Tunnel And Working Towards It In Your Time Of Crisis/Setbacks/Ill-Fortune/Tragedies – Is Yet Another Way

MYTH ABOUT LOVE

  1. The Belief That Our Partner Is The Source Of Love.
  2. Romantic Love And Passion Should Always Remain As It Is In The Beginning Of A Relationship.
  3. Romantic Love Will Fulfill All My Unmet Needs And Provide Me With Endless Love And Happiness
  4. Love Is Sacrifice
  5. You Will Know – When You Find Your True Love
  6. Love Will Make Me Complete
  7. Happy Couples Can See Things Through Each Other's Eyes
  8. Happy Couples Always Have Lots Of Romance
  9. Happy Couples Need To Have Common Interests
  10. Happy Couples Don't Fight
  11. Happy Couples Vent All Their Feelings To Each Other
  12. Happy Couples Are Always In Sync Sexually
  13. Half Of Marriages End In Divorce
  14. The Birth Of A First Child Ruins A Marriage
Murphy's Love Laws – taken From Internet
  • All The Good Ones Are Taken.
  • If The Person Isn't Taken, There's A Reason.
  • The Nicer Someone Is, The Farther Away (S)He Is From You.
  • Brains X Beauty X Availability = Constant.
  • The Amount Of Love Someone Feels For You Is Inversely Proportional To How Much You Love Them.
    Money Can't Buy Love, But It Sure Gets You A Great Bargaining Position.
  • Every Kind Action Has A Not-So-Kind Reaction.
  • The More Beautiful The Woman Is Who Loves You, The Easier It Is To Leave Her With No Hard Feelings.
  • Nothing Improves With Age.
  • No Matter How Many Times You've Had It, If It's Offered Take It, Because It'll Never Be Quite The Same Again.
  • Sex Takes Up The Least Amount Of Time And Causes The Most Amount Of Trouble.
  • There Is No Remedy For Sex But More Sex.
  • Sex Appeal Is 50% What You've Got And 50% What People Think You've Got.
  • When A Man's Wife Learns To Understand Him, She Usually Stops Listening To Him.
  • Never Sleep With Anyone Crazier Than Yourself.
  • The Qualities That Most Attract A Woman To A Man Are Usually The Same Ones She Can't Stand Years Later.
  • Love Your Neighbor, But Don't Get Caught.
  • Love Is A Matter Of Chemistry, Sex Is A Matter Of Physics.
  • Love Is The Triumph Of Imagination Over Intelligence.
  • Never Argue With A Women When She's Tired -- Or Rested.
  • A Woman Never Forgets The Men She Could Have Had; A Man, The Women He Couldn't.

Myth about Men

  1. Men Are Not Emotional - This May Come As A Surprise, But Men Are Probably More Emotional Than Women
  2. Sex Is What Matters The Most To The Men
  3. Men Hate To Commit
  4. Men Don't Communicate
  5. Men Don't Take Things Personally
  6. Men Don't Like To Listen To Criticism


MYTH ABOUT SEX

  1. Orgasm Is The Only Goal During Sexual Intercourse
  2. We All Have Multiple Orgasms
  3. You Can Tell The Size Of A Man's Penis By His Shoe Size & The Size Of His Hands
  4. You Can Only Orgasm Through Penetrative Sex
  5. Faking An Orgasm Is OK
  6. Sex Is Just Like It Is On TV Or It Should Be Like In Porn
  7. Condoms Ruin Sex
  8. Sex Needs To Last Hours
  9. Size Matters
  10. Only Men Have Wet Dreams
  11. Sex Gets Worse After Marriage

MYTH ABOUT COUNSELING - Here Are Five Of The Most Common.

1. Your Counsellor Will Tell You What To Do 2. The Counsellor Will Be Deciding Who Is 'Right' 3. Going To Counselling Means You've Failed At Your Relationship 4. Counselling Takes A Really Long Time And Doesn't Get Any Results. 5. Relationship Counselling Is Just For People With Really Serious Problems

Myths About Parenting

  1. We Should Not Fight In Front Of Children – In Fact If Are Emotionally Mature People & Have Established A Healthy Way To Resolve Conflict – Then They May Learn One Of The Most Valuable Lesson Of Their Life
  2. I Need To Protect Them – When They Are Infant And Do Not Understand – Protecting Them From Physical Hurt & Harm Is Alright. But Most Protected Children Turn Out To Be Unsure, Dependent, Low Self-Esteemed Children
  3. We Should Give Them All The Comforts That We Have Missed – Actually They Should Learn The Life Is Not Always Roses – The Ups & Downs And Difficulties Are To Be Expected & Lived Through
  4. We Should Fulfill All Their Demands – If You Do Then – They Would End Up Expecting The World To Give Them That & It Would Be A Recipe For Disaster
  5. Good Parent Should Always Put Their Kids Need First – If You Are Not Perfectly Happy How Long Can You Carry On The Mask & Give Your Best To The Kid
  6. I Will Be The Perfect Parent – There Is No Such Thing & To Become One We Make All Types Of Above Mistakes
  7. You Can Neglect Your Spouse /Marriage While Bringing Up The Kids – No A Balance Has To Be There – As Many Extra-Marital Affairs Starts From This Neglect.
  8. Parenting Is About Good Strategies & Tools => No It is About How You Behave, Act & Respond -If You Are Assertive Then You Will Raise Assertive Kids & If You Have Any Negative Characteristics You Will Condition Your Kids To Like That
  9. You Should Treat All Child Equally – This Has To Done As Per Their Individual Age, Needs & Requirements
  10. I Should Be Able To Provide For All Their Needs, Otherwise I Am A Failure As Parent – No They Should Grow With The Facts Of Life & Not With Blinkers
  11. Spending Quality Time – All The Time You Spend With Could Quality Time As Long As It Is Interactive, You Listen , You Ask, You Share Stories, You Play, You Make Them Help You In Chores
  12. If I Need To Instill Values – I Need To Be Correcting & Advising All The Time => No They Pick-Up From How They Observe You Behave, Not What You Say. Therefore Ensure That You Are Living The Values That You Want In Them
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