​Language that makes people your fan


In this article you will learn the following

  • -Learn the language of Love to create Deep-bonding
  • -How some people make others respect, like, love and care for them
  • -The importance and role of language of preferential-style - in building good relationship and understanding
  • -9 subconscious language-types and its sub-types - understand and use them to impress and create meaningful bonding with people who are most important to you

Language of appreciation, love, gratefulness, care, understanding and apology.

Learn and use the language to mesmerize others - Language that makes people your fan

Want to charm and create deep impressions and relationship with the people who matter?

Then learn the language - which will make then your fan.

Learn to express your appreciation, gratitude, apology, care and love in ways others understand.

And you would have come across few people who are able to established rapport very quickly and influence others – in an awe-striking manner.

They seems to have almost a magical way of conversing - some of their listener look as if they are hypnotized or in a trance.

For clarifications - trance is simply a heightened and focused state of attention - which many of us go into time to time when we are involved in doing something that we love.

The masters in the art of mesmerizing-communication - create trance in the person they are communicating with - by understanding and using the correct preferential-style of their receiving-communication.

But if unknowingly we happen to use in wrong way [that is in the paradox instead of their preferred style of the person we are communicating with] - then it can also create big misunderstandings.

Let share with you my own experience with my closest people - whom I love and care for most in the world.

I discovered to my utmost sadness and pain - that most of my closest people believe - that I do not appreciate them, that I do not apologize properly, that I am not grateful to them, that I don't give them importance and that I do not recognize their achievements etc.

They probably never considered that I am the one person who appreciates them maximum and I am the one who is most grateful for their presence in my life and that I care for them most.

Even though I go out of the way for each of these people - yet they could not realize nor felt that it was something big.

I happen to discover this at the age of 56.

Few would be able to imagine the pain it caused me.

I learned that there exists a language of appreciation, gratitude, apology, care and love - that if used consciously or sub-consciously - can create miraculous relationships and bonding.

Imagine this learning coming at 56 years of age – such a late enlightenment indeed!!!

It is especially so laughable – because I am in this field – by passion and choice and pleasure.

And I happen to discover this at the cost of almost distancing my closest relationships, e.g., family, parental, marital, siblings.

This is because - different people have different styles for - verbal and non-verbal communication.

Our preferred style - may be different - one for receiving-communication from others AND another for communicating-with others.

Our style depend on whether we are attuned to be - kinesthetic, auditory and visual or any mix of these three.

We use all three styles while communicating - but - we do have a dominant preferential language for giving as well as receiving whether verbal and non-verbal.

Then we may have some strange preferences because of our personality - e.g. - You may like to give gifts to your loved ones BUT just don't want to receive any gifts from anyone.

And then some people - won't feel appreciated at all - unless you have given them an expensive gift - all gestures, actions and care is not enough.

Has it ever happened with you - in which you said something very positive - with full sincerity and with intent of adding value to a person - YET - that person took it in completely different way - maybe even taking offence.

Then you may experience few instances - where you just can't seem to understand however hard you try - why the hell there was a misunderstanding with someone close to you - where there is no reason that you can see.

Then many of us expect others to understand us – without telling them about our expectations.

We expect others to understand our way of expressing our love, gratitude, empathy, apology and care – without realizing that they may have different mode of preferential reception to recognize the signals of love, gratitude, appreciation, respect, care etc.

And then we are totally flabbergasted - when they do not understand it – and at times feel bad about us not being sensitive enough.

When I went deeper into this - I found there are people of following 9 conversational-preferential styles – and if you can follow their preferential mode - you will be considered most charming, most caring, most loving and most respectful by these people.

The following 9 types with their subtypes are the distinctly separate types – but most of the people you would come across like 95%+ people – will have mixed preferential mode of receiving and giving.

Understand and use them to impress and create meaningful bonding with people who are most important to you - these 9 types are not exhaustive – but they covers the most exclusively independent types

  • 1.Ceremoniously dominated people
  • I.People who would love you to express your positive feelings, apologies through public display of affection [PDA]
  • II.People who would love to receive PDAs but won't express it to others themselves and vice versa
  • III.Then there are those hate both giving and receiving PDAs

2. Materialistically influenced people

  • I.People who want you to show your admiration, regret, apology by gifts-[they may have a scale – as per it the bigger your gift - the bigger your value to them]
  • II.People who absolutely hate the idea of giving and receiving gifts
  • III.People who may feel good receiving but do not give gifts and vice-versa
    3. People who expect you to show admiration by quality of words
  • I.People who would want you to constantly state your love, appreciation, gratefulness, admiration, recognition of their efforts – through words, both written and verbal
  • II.People who will only tell verbally you because there would be no additional non-verbal gestures from them – but their words mean the ultimate as far as these people are concerned
  • III.People who would love you to tell them all these verbally but they will never do the same
  • IV.People who would expect you to tell others behind their back – your appreciation, your remorse about them

4. Action people

  • I.People who would want you to show by real actions, gestures, acts of genuine love, care, appreciation for them – they are not moved by words alone
  • II.People who would do their utmost silently - their gratification comes from seeing their loved succeed, be happy and do well

5. People who want to be indulged

  • I.People who love to be pampered
  • II.People who cringe at the thought of being pampered [it could be through combination of PDA, gifts, gestures, words etc.]

6. People who would expect you to persistently mollify them while they are upset and sulk

7. People who would expect you understand them by asking them

8. People who would expect you to trust them, have faith in them

9. Kinesthetically motivated persons - these are the people – who want you to show your feelings for them - through physical touch, cuddling, walking holding hand, spending time together, doing chores together and off course making love

Use can use this learnings - not only in your romantic relationships – but in all your relationships - like bosses, business contacts and customers along with your family, friends and all near and dear ones - you can also make your "centers of influences" go out of their way to help you willingly and subconsciously.

You can learn about others through a combination of observation, asking, hit and trial method.

Another way of learning and understanding this language of yours – is to pay attention to what your most important relationships complain about you - what they complain about most of the times when it comes to you and the relationship

Unless you are a hermit, or a saint who has renounced the world of desires completely or a comatose - chances are you consciously and unconsciously seek, want, need - admiration, appreciation, love, gratitude, respect, care, apology from others.

In case, you are the rare one who is most comfortable with yourself – I can still bet that you will feel great receiving genuine appreciation once in a while.

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