How to negotiate


How to Negotiate Anything, Anywhere, Every time With Everyone Successfully and effectively

Do You want To Get Most Wonderful Deals In Life In Every Aspects

Please Ask Yourself

  • 1.Have You Ever Considered – How Important Is Negotiation In Our All Parts Of Life.
  • 2.How Many Of You Have Experience In Negotiation
  • 3.How Many Of You Have Learned How To Negotiate

Most Of Us Will Answer – In Negative To All Above Questions.

Actually – All The Above Answer Is Yes For All Of us.

We Were Great Negotiators When We Were Kids – We Could Hold Our Ground & Take Our Parents For Ride.

We Were Very Clear & Extremely Focused On What We Wanted - & – We Were So Creative Then That We Could Manipulate Our Parents In Most Cases, Very Easily => By Trying Out Ideas For Which Our Parents Did Not Have Any Clue On How To Handle.

But We Lost These Skills While We Growing-Up.

How Many Of You Wish That If Only You Had Negotiated Better In Few Situations – Then Many Things Would Have Been Positively Different

What Is Negotiation – Well If We Do Not Consider The Words As Negative Or Positive – They Would Be

  • 1.Bargaining
  • 2.Compromising
  • 3.Giving Concession
  • 4.Cooperation
  • 5.Bartering
  • 6.Getting Something From Others That We Need & Only They Can Give
  • 7.Ransom
  • 8.Exchange
  • 9.Conciliation
  • 10.Resolution
  • 11.Pacification
  • 12.Appeasement
  • 13.Reaching Agreement
  • 14.Blackmail
  • 15.Extortion Or Extraction
  • 16.Settlement
  • 17.Haggling
  • 18.Discussions On Win-Win Format

Few Negotiation Myth

  • 1.In Order To Win & Succeed => Others Must Lose
  • 2.It Is Only About Getting My Needs/Requirements Met
  • 3.I Should Give Away Only Insignificant Concessions
  • 4.Only One Thing Is Important
  • 5.The Power Myth – The Other Party Is More Powerful
  • 6.Sometimes Even The Thought I Need It Badly – They Are Not Interested
  • 7.This Is The Only Important Thing I Should Get – Myopic Understanding Of The Whole Situation – Rather Than Seeing The Big Picture
  • 8.I Should Get It Fast – Otherwise The World Will Fall
  • 9.I Am Not That Knowledgeable & They Are So Smart, They Have People Advising Them
  • 10.In Negotiation – the Party/Person We are Negotiating with is our Opponent/Enemy

In World-War & Cold-War Era – There Were The Following Distinctive Styles Of Negotiations – As Far As Countries Were Concerned.

We Can Learn A Great Deal From These Tactics.

  • I.Chinese Tactics – Make you Bogged Down, Tired, Confused

1.Tire The Foreign Side Down With Endless Issues – How They Do It – They Raise A Series Of Issues/Concerns/Challenges Which Are Related & Once You Have Tackled Them Then They Will Raise Another Series Of Unrelated

2.Their List Of Issues Is Endless And The Process Never Stops

3.Then They Make Ridiculous & Unreasonable Demands

4.Then They Will Either Refuse To Address Your Concerns Or Ignore And Not Pay Any Attention To It Or Keep Postponing

  • 5.Then They Keep Accusing You Of Violating Guiding Principles, Protocol Etc – In Fact They Are The Ones Who Are Doing It – But They Will Never Accept It If You Point Out To Them
  • 6.Threat You That We Will Walk Off Or Go To Other Parties – If You Do Not Accept Their (Un)Reasonable Demands
  • 7.Delaying To Wear Your Patience
  • 8.Create An Artificial Deadline – Which They Have No Intentions Of Honoring – In Fact They Will Ensure That The Agreement Is Not Reached By That Date

1.After Signing The Contract – They Will Come Back Again For Revisiting The Key Issues – As [They Will Give Compelling Reasons] – By This Time You Have Invested A Lot – So Many Go The Chinese Way

  • II. "The Soviet Style - Winning At All Cost"

1. Extreme Initial Positions - Buyers Low Offer Or A Seller's Higher Than Market Anticipations.

2. The Negotiator Will Always Be The One – Who Does Not Have The Authority To Decide – Where As They Will Ask For Decision Makers From Your Side

3. They Will Demand Concessions But On Their Part Will Not Give Big Ones – Under Guise Of Point 2

4. They Will Simply Ignore

III. The Japanese Style - Detailing

1.They Will Always Come In Teams

2.Every Different Level Will Have Different Teams – All Specialist Technically Of The In The Domain

3.No Decision Is Made In First Few Meetings – As For Them It Is Information Gathering Time Only

4.In First Few Meeting They Will Go Through The Same Questions – But Every Subsequent Meeting They Will Go In Depth Deeper & Deeper

5.The Team Does Decide – But The The Team At The Table – Only The Team At The Head-Office

6.They Go Over The Same Information Many Times To Reach Crystal Clear Understanding

7.You Cannot Rush Them As They Are Highly Skilled In Stalling Tactics

8.Once They Had Reached An Consensus At Their End – They Would Force You To Act Swiftly & If You Don't They Will Blame You For Delays

9.They Never Say No, Never Challenge Your Completely Argument And Never Would Break Off Negotiations – So As To Leave With Them A Way To Come Back On Negotiation Table In Case The Circumstances Change

IV.The American Style

1.​Competitive Approach

2.Coming To The Table With A Fallback Option

3.Beginning With An Unrealistic Offer;

4.Focus On Areas Of Disagreement, Not Areas Of Commonality Or Agreement

The Basics & Key Dos & Don'ts Of Negotiation

You Have To Select All The Ones Applicable As Per The Party You Are Negotiating With, Your Urgency [Real One], Situation Etc

THE Fundamentals

1. Please Understand – They Won't Be Negotiating – Unless They Have A Major Stake Too [Otherwise They Would Simply Make You Follow Their Dictate]

2. Nobody Is More Powerful – As Both The Parties Are Interdependent [Only The Party Which Thinks Other As More Powerful Usually Loses]

3. In Many Situations – Both Parties Can Win

4. If You Play Hardball – They Can Play The Same Too

5. For Your Needs To Be Met – Theirs Too Can Be Met

6. It Is Not About THE MONEY ALONE – Or One Factor => It Is About The Whole Package 7. You Never Give Anything Without Getting Something Back In Return

8. No Concession Is Of Less Value – If The Other Party Needs It

9. It Is Not About Ego – But The Results That Matters

10. For You To Win – They Need Not Lose – It Is About Win-Win

Good Negotiators Are

1. Great Listeners

2. Practice The Art Of Asking Tough, Pointed & Open-Ended Questions

3. Exercise Understanding, Clarifying, Asking Till There Is No Ambiguity

4. Keen Observer Of Other's Verbal, Non-Verbal, Actions, Said/Unsaid

5. Calmly Focus On Their Needs As Well As Others Need

6. Great Facilitators Who Can Bring Back The Negotiating Parties – If Getting Off Track

7. Respect Others

8. Are Polite

9. Assertive

Negotiation Stages


  • 1.Selecting Venue
  • 2.Selecting Team
  • 3.Allocating Roles & Responsibilities Before, During & Post Negotiation
  • 4.Do Back Ground Research On The Party You Are Going To Negotiate
  • 5.Identify What Is Negotiable For You[Meaning What All You Can Give] & What Is Not Negotiable & What All You Must Have In The Worst Case Scenario
  • 6.Plan How Will You Create An Amicable Environment For Them As Well As You
  • 7.Learn To Flinch/Show Extreme Exclamation Expressions Naturally
  • 8.Practice Assertiveness
  • 9.Have Mock Drill With People Who Have Powerful Personalities Than Yours
  • 10.Identify What Is The Worst That Can Happen If Negotiation Fails – Then Work Out How Will You Survive & Thrive
  • 11.Identify Your Worst & Best Case Scenario As Well As Theirs If You Can Gather Sufficient Information's
  • 12.Shop Around For Better Deals & Get The Information Of The Deals Which Are Available/Options & Alternatives

During Negotiation

  • 1.Do Not Fall Prey To Food, Wine, & Women
  • 2.Take A Break When Tired, Do Not Negotiate When Pressurized, Confused, Stuck
  • 3.Do Not Make Decision When Rushed By Others
  • 4.Build Trust
  • 5.First Spend Time In Understanding Their Offer, The Situation Etc
  • 6.Explore Options Beyond What Is Obvious – For Them As Well As You – Which Could Be Win-Win
  • 7.If It Is A Losing Proposition For You Totally – Be Prepared To Walk Away
  • 8.Find Out What You Have – Which Gives You Power[Typically The Concessions Which Are Insignificant For You – But They Need It Badly]
  • 9.If Can Identify In Clear Terms Yours & Theirs Win-Win – Nothing Like It
  • 10.Enjoy The Process – If Scared Then You Are Giving More Power To Them
  • 11.Structure Your Proposals
  • 12.If Possible – Subtly Claim That You Are Not The Ultimate Decision Maker[Or Ensure That This Decision Make Is Not Their]
  • 13.Start With Extreme Opening Offer – If Get Chance. Try For This
  • 14.If You Can Ensure That They Start Discussion/Negotiating On Your Offer – Nothing To Beat This
  • 15.If They Open – Give A Counter Extreme Offer Which Is Ridiculous
  • 16.Don't Be Afraid To Make Outrageous Offer/Counter-Offer
  • 17.Neither Think That You Would Be Insulting Them If You Are Very Low Or Very High
  • 18.Use The Power Of Silence – After Countering Them
  • 19.Try To Use The Up-Front Payment Trick For Gaining More Concessions
  • 20.Focus On The Total Package - Ask For Something Extra In Addition To Your Main Objectives – Which Will Not Coast Them Much.
  • 21.Give Lots Of Small Small Incentives To Make It Look How Much You Are Giving – But Never Give Anything However Small Without Something In Return
  • 22.Mix Tangibles & Intangibles
  • 23.Keep One Or Two Aces Always Hidden As A Trump Card
  • 24.If In A Stalemate – Be Flexible To Work Out Newer Alternatives/Options
  • 25.Always Challenge The First Offer
  • 26.Make Them Feel As If You Are Giving Too Much & That They Are Real Winners
  • 27.Try To Anticipate What Pressures They Are Under[Ignore Your Pressure] – Then Play From A Strong Position
  • 28.Acknowledge Counters Or Objections
  • 29.Never Discuss With Non-Decision Makers – They Will Only Extract Their Concessions Without Giving Anything To You
  • 30.Renegotiate If Needed

1.Be Dignified & Polite

2.Do Not Take Their Behavior Personally

  • 33.Be Very Clear In Your Communication -Stay Firm And Do Not Change Statements Quite Often


1.Do not Focus On The Weaknesses Of Each Other's Positions

2.Do not attack & do not make it personal

3.If you are not fair you cannot convince

4.If you can talk from their perspective & suggest as "another perspective/option" - then the buy-in from other would be greatest. Because when you show understanding of their situation/their perspective – you dis-arm them completely as they are not expecting it

5.Never get into an argument on Politics, Religion & Values

Having said that – it always better to walk away from argument => as the saying goes Nobody Gains by Winning an Argument or By Losing a Customer

Salary Negotiations

There Are Few Websites – You Can Use To Understand Your Worth To Give You An Edge While Negotiating Salary In An Interview

1.First Write Out The Ways You're Going To Add Value To The Company

2.Ask People – Who Have Worked In This Field, With This Company Etc

3.Simply Google It

4.Check The Following Websites




How to sell
​How to Handle Difficult People Effectively