Dealing with insecure Bosses

Dealing with bosses who are highly insecure.

In this article - we will learn the following

• -General ideas about insecure people
• -51 Signs of insecure bosses
• -6 Basic mindset needed - before you can prepare yourself to deal with insecure bosses
• -55 Tips - How to manage and deal with insecure bosses
• -10 Advantages of working with insecure bosses

Dealing with bosses who are highly insecure.

How to recognize people who are killing your self-esteem - eroding you confidence - making you feel bad about yourself - bull-dozing you and wrecking you emotionally PLUS professionally and in many-many other ways - because of their personal insecurities.

Most of us have our own insecurities.

But many people are driven and ruled by insecurities.

Insecure people are generally those who

• 1.Don't feel good about themselves
• 2.Don't respect, love and accept themselves
• 3.Are highly conscious of their lacunas, inadequacies, weaknesses
• 4.AND do anything to prevent getting their weaknesses exposed
• 5.Have very low self-worth/self-confidence/self-esteem

These emotionally insecure people use - all types of techniques like berating, insulting, controlling, suppressing, dominating, mocking, bullying, shouting, ridiculing, demeaning others - to cover-up their feelings.

Because they don't value themselves - they try to devalue and reducing others - instead of evolving themselves higher by inculcating qualities and acquiring confidence.

Highly insecure people are toxic people, who pull everyone around them down - They do not have any guilt or realization of - making others feel bad.

And when more and more people give-in to their tactics – many of them turn into monstrous bullies, dictators or people with very unhealthy social-disorders.

Whoever has to deal [live] with these insecure people - have miserable and hellish life.

51 Signs of insecure bosses

• 1.The following are the behaviors that you may notice [many of them would not be visible, as these people become experts in hiding their true feelings under the mask of superiority, power and 'don't give a damn attitude"]
• I.Arrogance
• II.Egoistic
• III.Most of the time on short-fuse
• IV.Controlling
• V.Vindictive
• 2.Entirely unpredictable
• 3.Jealous and envious
• 4.Comparing themselves with everyone - especially with juniors with better qualifications, skills and knowledge
• 5.Feel threatened with their junior's qualifications, intelligences, exposures, personalities [many times if it is attractive to opposite genders] etc.
• 6.They micro-manage everyone and everything
• 7.Can't delegate
• 8. Don't believe in empowering others
• 9.Make threats on a regular basis
• 10.Never share information in full - operates on need to know basis
• 11.Have great fear of losing control over people
• 12.Terrified of their weaknesses getting exposed
• 13.Take credit - for work done by juniors
• 14.Blame others - even if they are responsible
• 15.Doesn't take personal responsibility for anything
• 16.Delay taking decisions as long as possible
• 17.Highly critical and resist change - the status-quo is their way of ensuring that they are in control
• 18.Try to keep control of all aspects of decision-making
• 19.Highly suspicious, doubtful, mistrusting
• 20.Very shrewd about what would make them look good
• 21.Cunning and scheming and highly perceptive
• 22.Developed sense of what is threatening their image and how to eliminate these threats
• 23.Use politics, gossips and divide-n-rule etc. - to retain control and power
• 24.Highly self-centered
• 25.Need constant recognition and acknowledgements of how good they are from others
• 26.Surround themselves with people who are incompetent yet always praise them
• 27.They normally don't honor their verbal agreements
• 28.They love meetings - to show-off and boost
• 29.They normally can't trust anyone
• 30.Finds it next to impossible to laugh at themselves - but are quick to laugh at others
• 31.Have regular mood swings
• 32.Don't put any efforts for development of others
• 33.Insults juniors in public
• 34.Emphasis on I am right & I am the boss
• 35.Issues project directives without asking questions of the technical experts
• 36.Sets deadlines without involving the team on what is most optimal schedule
• 37.Can't say no his/her superior's unreasonable demands
• 38.Would rarely acknowledge other's contributions and never show their gratitude UNLESS they need them badly
• 39.Can't give clear directions
• 40.Never provides positive feedback
• 41.May make you wait for the meeting - where they have called you OR may not even come for meeting
• 42.Seems too busy - when you want to meet them - so won't listen to you ONLY pretend to listen to you
• 43.They will never explains their decisions
• 44.Many of them use the sentence - Just do what I say
• 45.They try to avoid issues that may result in confrontation
• 46.They will never seek clarifications when they don't understand or ask questions when they don't know the answer - as they don't want to be seem ill-knowledgeable
• 47.They may not be respectful of other's feelings
• 48.They may show signs of nervousness - when they find themselves in unchartered territory
• 49.They flip-flops - after saying something
• 50.They are great manipulators
• 51.Some of them have sadistic pleasure tendencies and feel happy to make others feel upset, pressurized and shaken

How to survive with insecure bosses - First Develop these 6 Basic understanding

• 1.You need to fine-tune yourself - them as per your boss's personality - because even if you have had the bad luck to work under more than one insecure boss - each of them will have their unique-nuisance-qualities
• 2.Understand their ill-treating you - is not about you - it is them
• 3.Recognize that your boss's distrust doesn't reflect on your capabilities
• 4.But it is all the more reason - you need to learn how to manage them - to be peaceful and successful
• 5.Understand that if your insecure boss - hates or jealous of you - it's probably because you are good
• 6.Understand that insecure bosses are not just insecure bosses - they are also insecure human-being.

55 Tips - How to manage and deal with insecure bosses

• 1.Identify your boss's insecurity triggers – because if it gets triggered, you are due for solid amount of hell
• 2.Identify when and in which situations - their insecurities take hold on them
• 3.Identify how they react and what they do - whenever their insecurities gets triggered
• 4.Now identify - what you do - when your boss use their controlling-dominating technique
• I.Do you react with anger
• II.Do you show your tantrum
• III.Do you sulk
• IV.Do you get into argument
• V.Or any other negative impulsive reaction
• 5.Now analyze - if your reactions - help you manage your boss better OR if your relationship with him is becoming strain
• 6.Now - identify - in which situation - your boss shows happiness and admiration with you [if at all - it happens with you]
• 7.Explore in how many ways you can deal with your boss in better and effective ways in future - when your boss's insecurity gets triggered
• 8.Few techniques are given below – tweak and customize - it as your situation AND boss's personality type AND your comfort level - to preventing and minimizing the triggers getting pressed unintentionally and unconsciously AND managing your Boss
• 9.Find ways to let this person feel that they are in control - when they are interacting with you - without killing your own self-identity
• 10.Never-never-never try to grab the limelight -when these people are around - The real decision-makers - will always know - who is the real worker[that is you] - in the long run
• 11.Try to give this person - credit for accomplishments and wins - irrespective of how much they contributed or deserve
• 12.Identify and connect with other powerful people, who can help you get transferred to other projects, jobs, organizations, places - in case it becomes difficult to handle your boss for longer periods - Because you would start losing your own self-identity and would yourself need therapy
• 13.Ensure that you are always dependable
• 14.Ensure that your work is always - excellent
• 15.Build and nurture relationships with key stakeholders, decision-makers and powerful people
• 16.Learn the art of diplomacy - so that even if you are interacting with these other centers of power – ensure that your boss feels that - whatever you are doing promotes their interests AND does not feel threatened by your relationships
• 17.Make yourself indispensable to the organization
• 18.Make your insecure seniors shine - in front of their superiors
• 19.If you can let your EGO take backseat - try to deflect some of your success to your boss - if you are getting limelight
• 20.Always praise your bosses - behind their back – they have wonderful grape-wine and channels of people - who will report back to them
• 21.Ensure that your insecure boss feels that they better off with you than without you
• 22.Working for an insecure leader is almost as bad as it can gets - because you will have to continually put efforts to keep your own self-esteem intact - in the face of regular undermining attempts
• 23.Make your boss feel included and involve
• 24.Become the person your manager trusts - you can then help make decisions quickly
• 25.Empathize with your boss - look at the big picture from your boss's perspective - [many pressures on them – such as year-end goals or unfinished projects — might be the cause of the boss's anxiety]
• 26.Share as much information as possible
• 27.Appreciate the positives and strengths of your boss
• 28.Never ever tell your boss - how nicely you can stand-in for them in their absence [or handled better]
• 29.Seek your boss's guidance and suggestions
• 30.Never question his authority
• 31.Never challenge or criticize the boss in the presence of others
• 32.Never share your career plans with them
• 33.Never share your large accomplishments - like that of newer course that you are attending or the speech you would be making in your professional network for international audience[in fact never let them feel that you have talents at least yourself]
• 34.Never try to bypass them
• 35.Never even joke about how you would love to sit in their position and chair
• 36.Be transparent in your communications and dealings
• 37.Understand why they are insecure [is your boss/superior - stepping into a new role, has there been a big change in higher-management top-leadership, are you highly competent and quite successful]
• 38.Treat them like your boss - Don't be their best friend, never try to get them into your social and professional media network
• 39.Having said all the above - all the above points are just the tactics to survive an insecure boss – it should never define who you are.
• 40.Don't become a pushover or doormat – practice and learn to be assertive*
• 41.Learn how to deal with difficult people*
• 42.Always remain professional*
• 43.Keep your personal life personal
• 44.You need to find ways, methods and people – to vent your frustrations, angers and disappointments effectively and regularly
• 45.Stay away from office gossip and people with negative attitudes in the workplace
• 46.Seek support from loved ones outside of work
• 47.Make sure that you are making plenty of time for self-care
• 48.Get out this organization - in case it becomes very suffocating
• 49.Learn to love yourself unconditionally*
• 50.Understand different types of bosses and handling them effectively*
• 51.Learn How to develop self-confidence*
• 52.Learn How handle stress* & overcome burnout*
• 53.Learn How to focus on your self-development*
• 54.Learn How to create opportunities*
• 55.Learn How to go start a business* and be an entrepreneur

All these * marked ones have DIY tips in the blog section - Success Unlimited Mantra

10 Advantages of working with insecure bosses

• 1.Knowing what not to do when you become a boss
• 2.Learning diplomacy* and tact
• 3.Using this skill to understand, identify and
• 4.Ability to deal with unwarranted criticism
• 5.Patience*
• 6.Working for the creating excellence* and not appreciation
• 7.Working under pressure*
• 8.Learning the skills of handling emotional disturbances
• 9.Stress handling*
• 10.Overcoming burnout

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