60 Tips How to Deal with Being Left-out & not Getting Invited and Included

In this article you will learn the following

21 Tips How to stop taking it Personally when you don't Get Invited

15 Tips How to respond when you are left out of important meetings

32 Tips on How to deal with feelings of not being invited

How to be ok with not being invited included considered & recognized

You have to realize that there is a great happiness in joy of missing out – in not wanting anything – of feeling fulfilled with what you have.

For this you need to be ambitious and don't have to make any compromise with your dreams, standards and values.

People with purpose vision and dreams have no time or need for drama and show-off – they invest their time, energy and efforts ingeniously - to create and live a powerful life of positivity and meaning.

On the other hand some people make their happiness and self-worth dependent on others – and when they don't get invited to some events [which they consider important] – they become resentful, hurt, embarrassed, ashamed, angry and even revengeful.

Yes it definitely sucks when you find yourself excluded from any group, activities or events that you feel your right to be part of.

Not getting invited or included - impacts the people with low self-esteem more - making them– as they feel unnerved, rattled and disturbed, lose their self-control and take this phenomenon very-very seriously and negatively.

This article is about taking ownership and full control of your life's quality as well its directions – and focusing on the most important things in life - love, peace, joy and gratitude it all works out in the end.

To get that focused you have to learn to be ok with not being invited, included or considered – and not to worry what others think and say about you.

But when you don't get invited to something that have the potential to add real positive value to your objectives and dreams – then you must take empowering actions to claim your rights.

Confidence is not about believing that people will like you BUT about how your being fine irrespective of whether they like you or not.

21 thought process adjustment you need to make to stop taking it personally - how to handle the pain of rejection or feeling excluded and how to get rid of fear of missing out or FOMO

• 1.When it is about them AND not about you
• I.When your not getting invited is happening because you never went to the other events they invited you - so they have stopped including you
• II.They might have assumed – that you would not be interested in this particular event – as they may believe that you have shown your dislike for this type of events in the past
• III.They feel that they are safeguarding your interest by not inviting you
• IV.They might have thought that you are not going to be available because of your own pre-arranged engagements
• V.This event might have happened on the spur of the moment – and whoever was there got included
• VI.Maybe this is a circle where they have different focus and completely different type of people – and they believe you may find yourself a misfit
• VII.It could be due to oversight and wrong assumption or even financial [yours of theirs] or logistic related issue – which made them you left out
• VIII.It could also be that you yourself missed – inviting this person few times – and they feel that you are not keen on this relationship
• IX.Maybe they find that when you are there – you steal the limelight
• X.Maybe they feel that you dominate the discussions
• XI.You might make them feel little or criticized or insulted or judged – which they don't want
• XII.You might have the habit of creating scenes or drama or some sort of unpleasant experience for others
• XIII.They may feel that they will lose out on something if they invite you
• 2.Could the reason has something to do with you - ask yourself
• I.Introspect objectively and ask – are you doing something that is putting people off – although it is very difficult if not impossible – creating self-awareness about your negative impact on others
• II.Become aware of times and situations and groups – when you go overboard and not only control the conversation but also take the limelight at the cost of people who are not assertive or who are submissive
• III.Do you tend to make people uncomfortable with the type of topics you bring out
• IV.Do you lack finesse or sophistication or social-grace and etiquettes
• V.Do you tend to say things or are in the habit of saying hurtful, insulting or belittling words
• VI.Do you unconsciously put-off people
• VII.Pay attention to how many other people are saying same thing about you – if your most loved and closest people are saying same things – then better take notice and work on yourself

15 Tips How to respond when you are left out of important meetings

• 1.You find out about an important meeting — one whose outcome affects you and your team — after it happens.
• 2.When you're overlooked for a meeting it feels bad personally and professionally and being the last to learn about key decisions can set your team back, and bring your leadership into question.
• 3.Then it might impact your influence and authority as well your team's ability to collaborate, coordinate – and it is your responsibility to assertively claim your space by advocating for yourself and your team – by raising the issue in an empowering and respectful manner.
• 4.You also need to master the art of navigating through the office politics without getting sucked into negative implications.
• 5.Learn to ensure Never let drama of few insecure people derail your career
• 6.Introspect and objectively become aware - if you are insecure and feel vulnerable or paranoid or egoist
• 7.Clarify your doubts by finding out – whether the meeting is about another team's objective – even though it may seem to you as if it relates with your team's work
• 8.Find out – if you have been getting open or disguised signals giving the message that you are in your way out – then this exclusion does not matter as you are on your way out [especially if the work-culture or the seniors are not vales-driven, emotionally-secure professionals]
• 9.Ask yourself if the benefits of your attending meeting outweighs the negatives of forcing yourself -if you feel you want to be involved because of your ego just drop the urge to be included – as you might antagonize people who may have power to influence your future in the organization
• 10.If you find that you need to be involved – you have to create a strong case why you should be included and how it may benefit the stakeholders and the organization, especially the seniors – you case should not focus majorly on your benefits alone
• 11.Focus on why your role makes it mandatory to be present in the meeting – all these should be based on data and evidence
• 12.Show how your presence would add value to the whole group and the long-term objective
• 13.Volunteer to help in organizing the logistics and meeting other requirements
• 14.Get in touch with the organizer to reach out can convey your thoughts, feelings, and tone most clearly – don't whine or complain just state the benefits - direct the conversation toward addressing why it makes sense for you to be present
• 15.Show how your proposal addresses the opportunities for the organization to work together more efficiently and productively

32 Tips How to deal with feelings on not being invited – all the tips given in this article have detailed Do-It-Yourself blogs/articles and answers among my 900+ blogs in my two websites & My Quora answers

• 1.Understand that it is perfectly normal and OK to feel hurt, disappointed, angry, resentful and even embarrassed by not being included in someone's plans – where you were expecting
• 2.And that, you have to learn to work on your these highly un-resourceful feelings and emotions – otherwise you would set yourself for a negative spiral of emotional roller-coaster
• 3.If these are close people who did not invite you in one-off event – you should give them the benefit of the doubt- assuming that either it was an innocent mistake as they have good intentions and feelings towards you
• 4.Identify the events when you had chosen not to invite few of these people
• 5.Also identify – when you left out someone – just because you forgot and regretted later
• 6.Recall times when you could not invite someone because of some very practical reasons
• 7.Understand that it is ok to not include everyone in everything that you are doing – you do this as well as others do it
• 8.Yes if you missed inviting them but you want to maintain good relationship with them - communicate your desire to include them in the future events
• 9.If you got left out by someone – use tact to let them know subtly - that – you would be interested in being part of their group
• 10.You can use the energy of the feeling of rejection – to connect with people who uplifts you
• 11.Learn to work on your insecurities and self-esteem
• 12.Learn to find joy of missing out JOMO
• 13.Learn to manage your negative emotions in empowering ways
• 14.If something like this make you upset – find out what – is it jealousy or hurt of getting ignored
• 15.Work on your self-respect and self-pride and self-confidence
• 16.Stop the urge to seek validations, approval and inclusion from others as your method of feeling good
• 17.Learn not to take things personally
• 18.Later when you are calm after initial explosive feelings – audit this relationship – is it something that is important to you or whether this relationship is not adding value to you
• 19.Find out – if these people are ignoring you for a while – then if need be let the relationship go – it is not worth your pain and suffering
• 20.If it is a regular affair accept it - and move on – but let go of your resentment
• 21.Do something nice for yourself have fun - understand that life is too short to dwell on missed invites
• 22.In case you are confused why you did not get included – share with a mutual friend and seek their perspectives – it could have a very simple explanation
• 23.In case you are not invited by a person who is otherwise nice with you – invite them in your event and give them special attention
• 24.If you have limitations because of which you can't invite them – if possible – give them a simple straight forward explanation – without going too much into detail or without being too apologetic
• 25.Learn to turn this exclusion into an opportunity to evaluate and make corrections in your own habits
• 26.Validate your feelings -determine how close you are to the person – if it is a casual acquaintance that you see once in a while – just don't bother about getting upset of not getting invited – and don't wallow in bitterness – this is about you and not them
• 27.Check if the social media posts are creating issues for you – of the person who did not invite you– then just un-follow this person so as not to see their posts in social media anymore
• 28.Acknowledge your emotions -consider the possibility that it was a mistake
• 29.Learn to act that you don't care being left-out – if you are with this person
• 30.If you are close to this person who did not invite you – ask him/her – directly and when you both are alone – without any resentment or anger
• 31.Forgive the people who excluded you – to make yourself calmer - look for inclusion elsewhere
• 32.Learn to enjoy your alone time - read a book, watch a movie or do anything that makes you feel rejuvenated