48 Tips How to Recognize and Deal with Jerks and Assholes Effectively

In this article, you will learn the following

-44 tips to deal with absolute jerks and assholes effectively

-48 Warning Signs You are Dating or dealing with a Jerk

-28 reasons Why Do They Do What They Do - Psychology Behind Jerks & assholes

-6 major reasons Why people Fall For assholes and jerks

-16 Little Ways You Act Like a Jerk and Don't Even Know It - How you treat other people is a direct reflection of how you feel about yourself

How to deal with Jerks and Assholes

Have you ever come across Jerks or assholes?

There is a proverb that says - unlike our brain, our stomach tells us when it is empty.

But in the case of Jerks even if their brain tells them that it is empty - they would probably rejoice at their fortune.

If you live in India - one ideology cult has almost 100% of people who fall under this - and their numbers are so great as to be unbelievable.

How can such a large mass be so downright Jackasses?

You don't even have to try to find them - because if you happen to - see hoardings, read newspaper, travel, watch news-channels, take walk in the park or go to the social-media OR listen to a bunch of people talk- they are there glaringly obvious.

I come across at least few everyday - only the sufferer knows the pain and distress the jerks and assholes cause to the people who have to face them -It is a torture of mammoth proportions.

Have you ever received emails promising millions of dollars - you will find that they are mostly a bunch of crooks with very less knowledge and qualifications along with poor grasp of English - jerks and assholes also have similar competence.

Basically the Jerks or assholes are- self-obsessed arrogant, egoist, cunning, completely self-centered and with crazily high sense of entitlement - people who are manipulators.

As per Wikipedia THE DEFINITION OF ASSHOLEs- given under quote unquote in the following paragraph only

"Asshole word is mainly used to describe people who are viewed as stupid, incompetent, unpleasant, or detestable. A person, who is almost always male, who considers himself of much greater moral or social importance than everyone else; who allows himself to enjoy special advantages and does so systematically, who does this out of an entrenched sense of entitlement; and who is immunized by his sense of entitlement against the complaints of other people, He feels he is not to be questioned, and he is the one who is chiefly wronged".

You may find similarity between this word and Cockwomble - read my article on this "How leaders Use Whataboutery to shift blame".

You may wonder - are these assholes are born or made - YES some assholes are born with such a privileged genetic wiring.

But most people turn into jerks and assholes through brainwashing as well as under some situations.

These jerks and assholes are most of the time males bullies [but females in the genre is fast catching-up] - Cockwomble, hypocrites and people who project their faults, weakness and lacunas on others.

It does not matter whether you met them in person or online or even read about them - jerks and assholes has the capacity to bring you down to their level - they will waste your time in the most insignificant matters while making you distracted by covering up the real important ones.

If you happen to spend time with jerks and assholes - it is so contagious and so annoying that for the rest of the day - you may also start behaving like them.

Intelligent sarcasm is the best way to limit jerks from crossing the limits of decency- which they do all the time- IF YOU CAN"T get rid of them.

Some people are jerks and assholes - because they put so much effort persistently to make you agree with their ideologies.

Most of the jerks can't think on their feet - they have what is called bully-mentality - the origin of their personality is deep-rooted insecurities, shame because of their low knowledge, education and any other significant qualities they want to have but see in others.

The Jerkism and Assholism becomes their lifestyle - for masters of this class.

Many of us can too - can be jerk and assholes with some people and under few typical situations.

Only by Standing-up to them assertively - can help you deal with them effectively - because there will always be jerks around you - BUT if can learn to deal with them effectively - your well-being and happiness will increase.

This article is about exploring and developing an outlook and your own personal strategy to help you preserve your sanity every aspect of your life - be it work, professional, business, social, personal - so that you ensure upto certain extent that your perfectly good days does no ruined by some jerk.

You also need to ensure that you yourself are not acting like a jerk or and asshole - when you are dealing with an annoying jerk or just because you are having bad days.

28 reasons Why Do They Do What They Do - Psychology Behind Jerks & assholes

• 1.They are into themselves all the time
• 2.Because they feel low they act high and might and almighty
• 3.They feel their jerkiness and assholism is very rewarding
• 4.Sometimes people would act like jerks is because they felt you hurt them
• 5.People may see you as a threat and start acting like a jerk
• 6.They are insecure and have a compulsive need to push others down to feel better about themselves
• 7.They have been a bully - to avoid their weaknesses coming out or any negative attention turned to them
• 8.They have never learned how to control their impulses
• 9.You might be triggering their deep-rooted insecurities because you are completely different from them - which makes them trying hard to compete and also try to control you
• 10.They are xenophobic and wants to control you - anyway anyhow
• 11.Because of their insecurities, anxieties and fears they have become sadists
• 12.They don't have sophisticated and polished social skills and accidentally do little things to offend people
• 13.They may be feeling socially anxious
• 14.They have very poor sense of humor and don't have empathy to know when they are crossing line of respect and decency
• 15.They might be using a technique which worked in another group but is inappropriate in this current situation
• 16.They have a real mean, vile and evil streak
• 17.They get feedback from their YES people who always shower praise on their bad behaviors - reinforcing this behavior more
• 18.They're insecure, and try to feel better about themselves by putting others down
• 19.They are insecure and know that they will be rejected sooner or later - so are on attack mode to cause irreparable damage
• 20.They see certain people as a threat and competition and use all tools to undermine them
• 21.They are generally unhappy and feel better when they make others miserable
• 22.They are trying to elevate their position by lowering others
• 23.They feel inadequate at confronting some people directly - that is why they go on direct as well as passive -aggressive attack
• 24.Because they were rejected and failed earlier - so they feel great to be in a position where they can cause damage to others
• 25.Their deep emotional insecurities have made them put-up a facade of false sense of superiority - which they show it by being belittling, critical, and dismissive
• 26.They are convinced that the way to be popular is to act like a jerk
• 27.They believe they need to attack all those whom they don't respect or agree with
• 28.They have multiple psychological disorders - But being a powerful position - it is getting increasingly toxic - because of vile and power hungry supporters

6 major reason Why people Fall For assholes and jerks

• 1.In the heart of heart of most of the insecure people - bad boys seems so darn attractive - because they want to get the limelight the assholes and jerks are getting
• 2.Becoming part of a mob gives them some relief from the feelings of being inadequate - yes the assholes and jerks have their own exclusive club
• 3.They have their own agenda - getting power and satisfying their greed
• 4.Might have criminal intent
• 5.Are highly insecure and the only way they can feel better is by joining a mob
• 6.By Being an asshole and jerk - satisfies some of the needs to belong and reduces their emotional pain by being able to act out their hidden regrets hurt or shame

48 Warning Signs You are Dating or dealing with a Jerk

• 1.This person is making you doubt your own sanity and reality
• 2.This person is eroding your self-esteem, self-worth, self-pride and self-confidence in most negative ways
• 3.He/she does not care or respect your feelings
• 4.Being with this person is always about him/her - your wants and needs and wishes never matter
• 5.You will always feel fearful
• 6.This person disappear and reappear on their convenience
• 7.This person jokes, insults, puts you down in public all the time
• 8.This person laugh at other person's weaknesses and hurt points
• 9.When challenged - you may notice absence of spine in these people - as they change their tune when confronted by someone with supposedly more power
• 10.They are extremely selfish
• 11.They generally treat - juniors, helpless and weak people badly
• 12.They disregard and disrespect others' healthy boundaries
• 13.They never honor their promise
• 14.They will be perpetually late and completely unapologetic and may cancel plans without informing you
• 15.They always downplay and undermine your major significant accomplishments and always boost about their insignificant ones to glory
• 16.Many of them can be some or all of being a - narcissist, Megalomaniac, Whatabouter, manipulator and Cockwomble -
• 17.They never accept that they are ever wrong - so will not ever apologize
• 18.They hide their past - BUT - create stories of magnanimous bravery and achievements of their past which nobody other than their supporters see and believe
• 19.You find that you are getting conflicted signals from your heart and brain and you feel thoroughly confused and lost
• 20.They only talk about them - it is always Me, I, Mine and myself for them
• 21.They tell offensive jokes or use offensive language
• 22.They use all techniques to suppress and oppress - they use pushy and intrusive techniques
• 23.They are mean, Manipulative, cunning and extremely opportunist person of most monstrously negative nature
• 24.They are disrespectful to others and their opinions
• 25.They while and complain and blame and make excuse - when get confronted or when they are not getting their way
• 26.They throw tantrums
• 27.They love creating drama
• 28.They make outlandish claims
• 29.They lie and lie and lie
• 30.They make comments that cut other people deeply without any guild, shame or remorse - on
• 31.Making overly-cutting jokes, under the flimsy pretense of, "I'm only kidding around"
• 32.They give backhanded compliments or criticize under the guise of appreciation
• 33.They purposely do something with the intent to annoy others
• 34.They show insult and show contempt for other's opinions, behaviors, or sense of humor
• 35.They share confidential information with the intent to cause hurt and damage
• 36.They bring out other's flaws in front of lots of people publicly
• 37.They try to sabotage other's reputation
• 38.They equate nice-people with stupid - to be used for their objectives
• 39.They love power as power gets them what they want and then they live the proverb - Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely - becoming even greater jerks
• 40.They get rewarded being a Narcissist
• 41.They find that their Rudeness, their cruelty, their disregard, their insensitivity gets them more Power
• 42.They manaage well without giving any Apology for any mistakes they have made
• 43.They are convinced that their jerkiness makes people love them as people see them as strong
• 44.They enjoy tarnishing other's image to make them seem better
• 45.They use Arguments as their Stress-buster
• 46.The more power they crave and the Competition they have gives them energy
• 47.They know that saying Does not Get anything to them
• 48.They believe that to look superior - they need to show-off

44 tips to deal absolute jerks and assholes effectively

• 1.Trust your gut -Know when to walk away
• 2.Work on your self-worth, self-esteem, self-confidence, self-pride
• 3.You may find letting a narcissist jerk very-very hard to let go
• 4.Know their psychology - why a particular jerk is doing what he/she is doing -Confront problematic behavior early and often - because most people avoid confronting a jerk - jerk gain their power
• 5.Understand that You will have to restart your life by leaving this hurting phase behind - by surrounding yourself with positive people
• 6.Maintain Your Physical Distance, avoid them and ignore them if it is possible
• 7.Don't Be Quick to Judge - by giving tag of jerk & Asshole to some innocent people because they are behaving erratically due to having real bad time and phase
• 8.Learn to be understanding of people's varying moods and be sympathetic
• 9.Don't take it personally - what jerks and assholes say or do - IT is not about you - it is about them
• 10.If you have any people in your life who are constantly exhausting, make you feel bad about yourself - make you feel little and ashamed and insulted and drain you - CUT them out of your life are they are invariably limiting your opportunities for growth, joy, peace and bliss
• 11.Learn and Practice Emotional Detachment and disassociation mentally-if you feel like this person gains a sense of joy from making you feel badly about yourself
• 12.Quit and resign -If the environment where you work encourages the bully-club people to make others feel ashamed, humiliated, disrespected, or de-energized
• 13.In certain situation you need to fight back but alone can't - create a group of likeminded people to stop suppression and oppression BUTDon't be aggressive or try to get revenge - because then you will become the jerk and asshole of their levels
• 14.Don't engage them in arguments and try to beat them you can't as they are the masters in this game - INSTEAD - Prove Them Wrong in deed and actions
• 15.Work Toward Creating a Jerk-Free Environment
• 16.Stop paying any attention to these vampires
• 17.Learn to recognize the jerks and assholes and their tactics early - so as to avoid getting in their traps
• 18.Lay low to prevent getting caught in jerk's radar - although you could be highly talented, accomplished and productive - especially if a jerk is your senior - till you find a better opportunity to move on
• 19.If any jerk upsets you - think about how harmful it would to you and your loved ones if you let that emotion drive your actions
• 20.In case you can't avoid them - play strategically to make you look like their well-wishers when these petty tyrants the people in low-prestige positions with some power over your current fate
• 21.Wait them out while you keep building allies and you keep documenting
• 22.Learn intelligent comebacks - which have the double meaning only intelligent people will understand and not the jerks
• 23.Identify create and enforce healthy emotional boundaries
• 24.Never engage in arguments with an assholes - they will beat you hands-down - for two reasons - one You can never win in such engagements - and 2nd don't teach a pig to play flute - as it wastes your time and it annoys the pig
• 25.Confront the jerk in private is a better alternative
• 26.Learn to identify jerks, morons and Identify idiots early – never try to change them as they will never change -so don't waste your time and energy
• 27.Never take any idiot personally – they might now be attacking you - they probably are just being idiots
• 28.Never argue with idiots – it will always backfire to you
• 29.Never try to explain your sound logic or try to reason with them – their idiot logic is all what they understand
• 30.Understand that it only takes another moron to please one idiot – if you are not an idiot yourself DON'T even try to please them
• 31.Never expect idiots to appreciate your intelligence and your bright ideas – they feel they know it better and that you are the moron
• 32.Learn to never let any idiot trigger you into foolish actions and behaviors
• 33.Understand that depending on where you live, work and socialize – you would encounter few of them every day – unless it is important an unavoidable – don't let them near you
• 34.If you have A Jerk boss - always identify how much dependent you are on this job and how long you may take to get another or better job -Consider creating changes in your own tactics, mindset and behaviors -This step applies to unrepentant jerks who are in powerful positions
• 35.If you're a boss -don't wait for people to complain before you take action on jerks -Take a good, long look in the mirror - whether you - yourself are the real jerk
• 36.It is always possible that you are the bigger jerk - but then BIGGEST-jerks don't have the empathy to know that they themselves are the jerks
• 37.Identify if you have crossed the line of basic decency and respect - make amends
• 38.Admit you are not perfect -Commit to behaving differently -Monitor your behavior
• 39.Identify which person, situation or you own mental-emotional state - triggers your jerk behavior
• 40.Ask how you would feel if someone did the same to you -Be more thoughtful about how you playfully tease people
• 41.Learn to Act with compassion and kindness - Treat others with kindness, respect, love.
• 42.Focus on what you can control -Stop making excuses
• 43.Understand that if you want to be a great leader - you can't focus on always being liked by others - as Always being liked comes with high level negative consequences
• 44.You need to become respectable rather than likable -Clarify Expectations for behaviors, performance or attitude -Be Consistent -Relate to your expectations consistently - If you are consistent, people around you also learn to be consistent.

16 Little Ways You Act Like a Jerk and Don't Even Know It - How you treat other people is a direct reflection of how you feel about yourself

• 1.When you see your dog pooping on the sidewalk - you ignore and walk away
• 2.You post selfies and party photos on hourly basis
• 3.You don't return greetings of others
• 4.You don't feel it is good to wish others
• 5.You keep looking at your mobile while talking with others
• 6.You use technical jargons that you know perfectly other people won't understand
• 7.You show-off all the time
• 8.You pretend to be someone else
• 9.You project your insecurities on others
• 10.You are a Cockwomble
• 11.You are a Hypocrite
• 12.You talk with your speaker phone in public
• 13.You watch videos and listen to music in full volume in public places
• 14.You feel proud breaking rules and law
• 15.You either shake hands as if doing a favor listlessly OR as a wrestle trying to break their fingers
• 16.You only talk about yourself all the time