100 Signs of healthy and unhealthy relationships

In this article you will learn the following

­-32 most essential elements for an utmost fulfilling and happy relationship

-45 signs if your relationship is unhealthily or negative - from both aggressors as well as aggrieved perspective

-33 ways to give attention to your partner - how to improve your relationship

Healthy relationship are those - where you feel secure, safe, valued, trusted and is mutually growth-oriented.

When your partner is going through dark phases of his or her life - you can create positive meaningful difference in their life - by trying to fulfill - their needs for attention and affection.

This can be further expanded to include - acceptance, appreciation, guidance, direction and compassion - to help them beat the blues.

The type of relationships that you have currently as well as attract in future - would largely depends on - how you were loved and treated by the important figures of your life while growing up as well as type of intimate relationships you observed.

Someone who was not valued, respected and loved in healthy ways - grows-up into an emotionally-insecure and emotionally-immature adult and - may find their relationships being much less than healthy, happy and fulfilling.

32 most essential elements for an utmost fulfilling and happy relationship

• 1.Focusing more on interdependence than co-dependency
• 2.Fostering a nurturing space for both the partners to maintain their own self-identity through a separate social-circle, interests-hobbies-passions
• 3.Spending time together in such a way that makes both feel valued and which adds growth-value to both
• 4.Has communication - having difficult conversations honestly-assertively-respectfully
• 5.Resolving conflict in healthy manner
• 6.Taking initiative to clear misunderstanding
• 7.Freedom to say no - when does not like something - without your partner feeling hurt
• 8.Handling tough-issues assertively and openly
• 9.Supporting each other and standing-by - whenever needed
• 10.Cheering each other - when the other is going through negative phases
• 11.Developing understanding to accept your partner as they are as a whole - with their flaws, insecurities and also positive qualities [accepting the other yet wishing that they change certain aspects of how they act is definitely ok - healthy relationship is all about mutual agreements and healthy negotiating}
• 12.No intent or attempt to dominate or control the other person
• 13.Appreciation, recognition and acknowledgement of each other's contributions in the relationship
• 14.Understanding and using of each other's language of love [we all love in different ways - we express and show affection in different ways -we expect to receive love in different ways]
• 15.Display of affection and compassion including PDAs
• 16.Giving attention to your partner rather than hogging limelight
• 17.Giving importance to each other's feelings
• 18.Conveying that your partner is important to you and that you understand and appreciate their needs
• 19.Able to express deepest fears, anxieties and concerns without inhibitions
• 20.Empathic listening
• 21.Expressing and sharing feelings openly and respectfully
• 22.Respecting each other's boundaries
• 23.Playfulness and being naughty
• 24.Ensuring in pillow-talks or talking-dirty
• 25.Encouraging your partner to bloom into who they are
• 26.Being yourself and being comfortable with being yourself especially with your partner
• 27.Having fulfilling physical and emotional intimacy
• 28.Allowing each other to be who you both are - to exhibit their less-than-perfect side
• 29.Allowed to feel how they feel after disagreements and conflicts
• 30.Allowed to express their own needs and wishes without fear of judgement, contempt or ridicule from the other
• 31.Able to be vulnerable without fear of getting ridiculed
• 32.Asking to clarify about the kind of love you need - by simply saying show me how to love you better or how to make you feel great or how to make you feel the most loved [man or woman]

45 signs if your relationship is unhealthily or negative - from both aggressors as well as aggrieved perspective

• 1.Requiring another person's constant and undivided attention
• 2.Depending on your partner in order to feel complete
• 3.Attaching your wellbeing, happiness and satisfaction with your partner
• 4.Trying to keep your partner 24x7 with you
• 5.Suffocating your partner with your demands
• 6.Wanting 100% attention of your partner 24x7
• 7.Being suspicious and jealous of all your partner's contact and professional-family-social relationships
• 8.Creating and thriving on drama
• 9.Throwing tantrums
• 10.Playing victim
• 11.Blaming your partner for all the wrong happening in the relationship
• 12.Taking your partner for granted
• 13.Letting your partner do all the nurturing
• 14.Engaging in emotional-blackmail - using your vulnerabilities and weaknesses
• 15.Focus on changing your partner
• 16.Violating your partner's basic boundaries of dignity and respect
• 17.Seeking your partner's attention, approval and validation for things that are your own private
• 18.Trying to please your partner while ignoring your own basic needs
• 19.Demanding that the other person behaves and act the way you want him or her to be
• 20.Compromising vital aspects of yourself
• 21.Losing your self-identity
• 22.Scared to challenge and ask
• 23.Letting your partner take you for granted
• 24.Feeling unappreciated
• 25.Avoiding confrontations and conversations
• 26.Expecting your partner to read your mind without telling him or her what is in your mind or what you want or how you feel
• 27.Feel scared of your partner's reactions and outbursts
• 28.Your partner controls who you meet and where you go
• 29.You are scared to go to social visits with your partner as you will get laughed-at insultingly
• 30.Your self-esteem has reached such-lows that - you beg for love, attention and other such natural-relationship elements from your partner
• 31.You get judged and criticized no matter what you do or say
• 32.There is physical or mental or emotional or financial or sexual abuse
• 33.You have started blaming yourself for all the bad things happening in the relationship and with you
• 34.You start changing and compromising with your self-identity to please
• 35.You or your partner have turned passive-aggressive
• 36.You have resentment and bitterness and anger towards your partner you are spending more time on the phone rather than talking with each other
• 37.You have stopped sharing their needs
• 38.You have lost interest in getting intimate
• 39.You feel your partner has become a stranger
• 40.You feel the relationship has turned distant and cold lack of reciprocation
• 41.You don't pay attention to them
• 42.You don't try do something that makes them feel good and which you used to do
• 43.You can' agree on anything - you argue a lot
• 44.You feel good spending time without them
• 45.You don't fee any physical or emotional intimacy with your partner anymore

33 ways to give attention to your partner - how to improve your relationship

• 1.Focus on yourself instead - Do things that have always interested you. Start going to the gym, join a new book club, or take a class -stop begging for your partner's attention
• 2.Stop trying to control your partner
• 3.Ask yourself whether you have become critical and bitter towards your partner because of your frustration with him or her in any way - especially those which you have expectations but you are expecting your partner read your mind
• 4.Clearly, honestly, and courageously express your feelings, experience and your needs
• 5.Also ask them what they want from you
• 6.Provide positive reinforcement to your partner - focus on those behaviors they do well instead of focusing on what they don't do.
• 7.Consider therapy. If the situation isn't improving, consider seeking professional help through therapy
• 8.Ask yourself
• I.Why should you be grateful for your partner's presence in your life - in which ways they have contributed towards making your life better
• II.Do you feel proud about them
• III.Have you ever shared this with them
• IV.Why not and how can you share now
• 9.Understand it's a conscious and continuous effort - don't give up on your partner if your partner is busy - ask them for their free time or talk.
• 10.Plan a trip together cook special meals
• 11.Start making decisions together
• 12.Ask for and understand their grievances and resentment
• 13.Don't demand that they change their behavior instead, try to understand your partner
• 14.If you have this habit - stop nagging
• 15.Make a point to really listen to them put your phone down
• 16.Do something kind for them every day.
• 17.Plan something just for the two of you.
• 18.Verbally tell them that you care for them and reinforce this with your actions and gestures
• 19.Do something unexpected - create pleasant surprises
• 20.Make time for them, no matter how busy you are - simply be present
• 21.Touch matters - initiate sex, intimacy & affection
• 22.Master pillow-talk
• 23.Become empathic - say your partner forgot your anniversary - try to find is it because they have lot of stress
• 24.Ask questions about an aspect of their daily life you've never really thought about before.
• 25.Suggest a new activity to try together.
• 26.Bond over shared memories or swap individual ones from your childhood.
• 27.Spending time together is important - but giving space is as necessary - give them privacy especially emotional-privacy
• 28.Understand that all of us have different emotional and physical needs
• 29.But also accept that - all your needs will never be met - so try to create balance internally
• 30.Make note of what's going on in their lives -do more things together
• 31.Be an active person - who takes the initiative or makes a decision in the situation is considered the active person - rather than being a person who is passive [remains unresponsive, disengaged, apathetic]
• 32.Stop reacting - take a moment to reflect - take a walk
• 33.Practice the concept - that when you start focusing on making your partner feel good by giving all that you desire - you start receiving

6 significant impacts of lack of attention, affection, respect and love - in relationship

• 1.All of us crave attention one way or the other
• 2.We lose the connection and the bonding with a person who could play a vital role in your growth and development as well as happiness
• 3.Become insensitive and maybe emotionally-numb
• 4.You develop poor self-esteem and self-worth
• 5.Lack of physical, mental and emotional intimacy
• 6.Will lead to a level where either or both partner would become vulnerable to infidelity - anyone who feels unwanted and have been ignored and neglected for long will be get attracted to people who are ready to give them the time and attention that they need and are not getting